Another devastating situation here, and need to hear from people who have experience with psychopaths
3 years ago, my husband just walked away leaving me with 3 little kids
Ever since divorce started I have been discovering him in such a strange ways that were kind of present while we were married, but he would always charm me into it, and put another mask, but now he obviously started twisting things, giving me illogical explanations, lies,,,, and I would go ballistic not understanding any of it. For a long time I couldn’t stop crying from sadness and confusion. I had seen him lie before, take advantage of people, but it was “mild” and he always made a joke about it like no big deal, but once we started divorce those lies and games started growing bigger, meaner, devastating, it seemed as if he was trying to persuade himself in the stories he was fabricating
At the same time he was rapidly climbing up business pyramid becoming a CEO of a big marketing agency having only high school diploma, just another thing to confuse me. So pretty soon I learned of psychopaths and found him in every description I read. He gave me a clue on this, after starting counseling which I begged for a few years ago, and then he stopped after 3 sessions, but told me that the therapist told him, he was missing center for processing emotions, then I put pieces together
I have been having hell of a life for the past 3 years. I also took my kids for counseling, and they are still doing it, but when I told the psychologist about my suspicion that he might be Psychopath, she told me she cant do anything till the damage is done. He will not harm them physically, but emotionally he manipulates them and has only been providing entertaining and materialistic aspects of relationship so much of it that my 10 y old son, said, daddy is ok but doesn’t have a hearth
No one except for my best girlfriend could understand what I’m experiencing. I was left suddenly in the middle of the night without any conversation about divorce, tho he left me 2 times in the past and come back, this time with a baby less then a year old, and 8 & 11 years old kids, no job, in a very isolated area out of the city.
My family did not understand the heaviness of my situation even when I ended up in the emergency 10 months ago and had a spine surgery, disc hernia, and I’m about to lose the house for he took the kids while I was in recovery and stop pay mortgagee
I started seeing a therapist some time ago only to come to the issues with my mother, the drama queen, who goes from grandiose to depressed, who always has been accusing one of the family members for something wrong in her life, first was my father for many years, the moment I become an adult it was me, when I moved to the other country, my sister become the enemy. Then my father suddenly passed away from hearth attack .The whole family is always in fights, there are accusations, misinterpretations, and mother always rules the game, it’s all about her needs and unhappiness.
The therapist tells me I had allowed the psychopath in my life, because I developed the model of empathizing and serving a person with narcissist disorder or something like that
Now I have a double fire in my life, and the moment I heard this I wanted to cut already heavy and sick relationship with her, but the growing problem is the relationship with my 4 siblings. Im learning from my psychopath husband that cutting contacts and minimizing conversations is the only possible way, but I cant do this with my mother, because my siblings, unaware of her diagnosis and regardless of the fact that none one of them live happy lives, are backfiring on me
They didn't have the wake up call I got from Psychopath. in order to realize that we were raised by narcissist, and They don’t sympathize with my situation
when I’m not available for family fights and discussions over another game my mother is playing, they call my kids who already have difficult childhood, dealing with divorce, psychopath father, and now my sisters telling them what to do
I’m getting into another spider web, which I cannot afford, and want to take a distance from all of them until I heal. feel very alone in the experience
What to do
English is my second language, so please tolerate