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#12210 - 11/05/11 11:44 PM Dealing with the holidays
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Hi,

Perhaps you have read my posts about the psychopathic mother-in-law and (maybe) "secondary psychopath" sister-in-law. Things have gotten a little bit quieter in the couple of weeks since the death of my husband's father. We are still deciding if it would be worth it to see an attorney about making them honor the intent of the will. My husband has relaxed, but I am waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Anyway, we moved out here to the southwest one year ago, for the climate and our health, and kind of thought we would have some family out here. We have some nieces and nephews here, etc. I moved away from almost all my family back in the southeast and I miss them. We miss our friends and associates.

The holidays with husband's family last year were "okay," since the new hadn't worn off yet, and the **** hadn't hit the fan yet. But this year I told him that if I am required to spend Thanksgiving and/or Christmas with them, I would probably have to say some things to some people. It has become glaringly obvious that MIL and SIL have told all the family some pretty bad things about us, for sure that we continually threaten to sue them and they're scared to death of us. Which couldn't be further from the truth! Nobody has mentioned suing anyone. (Actually I think it's what THEY would like to do, but I can't imagine upon what grounds. Or perhaps they think it's what they would do if they were in our shoes, and if that's the case, then we probably should.) I can see the hairy eye from several of the nieces and nephews whenever we cross paths. We no longer get communication from any of them, no invitations to family events, etc. Can't even get anybody to tell us the best places to find goods and services -- that's no skin off their nose, but no, they won't talk. I might as well have moved out in the middle of the desert by myself and lived under a rock. Hmm, not a bad idea.

At the holiday gathering I would want to tell them that if they are hearing unpleasant things about us, they might do well to come directly to us and ask if they are true. That's a pretty good thing to do within any kind of group. But you know the old psychopath isolation thing. They are probably told that they're the only one who knows this deep, dark secret, and to keep it under their hat under pain of death. Meanwhile, the weird looks in our direction for who knows what.

My husband says that if I do that, MIL will have gained a victory because she'll know she's finally gotten to me. Well, yeah, intellectually I know that. But I would sure love to throw a royal ruckus and break some things and smack a few people. Geez, that is not like me. I am ranting here. My heart is broken.

I am infuriated that my husband and I are probably the most honest and open people in the whole group, yet we are being vilified as some kind of wacko trouble makers -- because we insist on reality and the truth.

Today at the store I turned a corner and ran into a beautiful Christmas dinner display with Christmas china and wine goblets, candles, red and green linens, the whole thing. My mother back home always does this for the holidays, and I don't think we're going to be able to get back there. With our health as it is, traveling is very hard. The sense of loss and anger and grief upon seeing that display almost broke me down right there in the store.

I asked my husband to please keep an eye on me today because my mood was slipping down pretty badly. And I had been doing so well ...

I'm feeling kind of bleak at the moment. Looks like we might be spending Thanksgiving and Christmas by ourselves.

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#12212 - 11/06/11 03:27 AM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
1Healing Offline
member

Registered: 10/25/11
Posts: 87
blueheron,

I hope you have a good holiday despite the family stuff... Change is not easy & it sounds like there are changes on mulitiple levels right now. I can relate.

Too, the unique thing of this is how to keep the anger out of it, not easy!

This holiday will be complicated for myself as well. There are stages to loss/change which I'm aware of.. but the holidays can create added stressors..

Yrs ago, when alone, I remember at times on occassion spending a holiday alone, out of choice as I didn't feel good & just didn't feel up to the gathering/company. Fortunately noone was insulted but I just didn't feel good & knew my prescence wouldn't help anything.. BUT I made sure to celebrate myself & actually did have a good day inspite of it all (when I spent holiday alone). I don't think it's a good, "habit," but at the same time, maybe some of this too is about giving permission to grieve, the loss/es & celebrate, life & as is.. ?!

There are many changes here as to transportation cuts & since I am not able to drive (ex h Psychopath took car & I am in no financial position or ability even at the moment to get a vehicle) SO my own getting out has been further hampered, plus the charge of city bus service has gone up.
I'm trying to put my life back together which was literally toppled by his undoings (he stuck me with debt/ & made sure to unravel what was before he conveniently walked out of my life.. which to him I guess was rather humorous..?..)..

IF I can keep my whits about me that somehow there has to be a bigger picture to this, Psychopath stuff & God, that I refuse to let him destroy me, & eventually I will get things back ordered as I need them..

Too, what you say blueheron about honesty, is so important to me. I've had situations arise which I could have taken the easy route & numerous as well, but when I have to choose I am forgoing that.. at least where I feel it compromises my ethics /beliefs, etc.. I'd rather keep walking through the fire of which seems turned up on high right now.

When people upset me at times I try to tell myself that I have to recenter, keep the focus on my life, my own healing, etc. It's good that others do have their own world, whatever that is for them, even if I don't agree with or understand at times. The worst of my being married to ex h Psychopath was that he was so close to me & the effects were very direct & thus now lifealtering to the extreme. I don't have him in my face any longer to do further damage. Not that I wanted a divorce, he left & it was his undoing, all of this .. BUT I'm trying to see the glass 1/2 full .. even when it seems less.. as long as there is the ability to fill up on / my spirit remains in tact & that which is good remains / no evil can destroy me.

Too, it seems that God Wants me to Himself, I guess, as that is how my life is ending up..
if I were living a life of sin & disrespect, doing whatever I want to do without caring for & about others I would maybe say otherwise.. but you are so right, being honest, doing what is right..
living a life pleasing to GOD.. that is what matters most..
I'm glad I did have my yrs single because I know that I can build upon, it's having the foundation right.. I try hard to love at all times.. it's not easy. I found that having Psychopath in my life has created the most difficult situation I have ever faced & to love past this (him / as God Loves) my greatest challenge. There is a big picture to this.. I hope you have a WONDERFUL holiday!!! I think I am going to do some really extra special things this yr (holiday) just because I can?! smile

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#12259 - 11/12/11 11:28 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: 1Healing]
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
1Healing, I just loved your special reply, and have read it several times without knowing what to say.

As for being honest and walking through the fire, it is the Refiner's fire, and the end result is pure gold.

Let's do be kind to ourselves for the holidays.

blue heron

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#12265 - 11/13/11 04:10 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Hello, all,

I am still dealing with the idea of staying away from the in-laws on Thanksgiving Day. There's only one problem: my husband feels the need to be in attendance, and hopes I will make some food and go along with him.

I cannot talk him out of it, that's his choice. But I'm concerned that if I do not go, he will reap some pain and grief from them about it. That's his choice too. It hasn't gotten too upsetting between us over this issue. He knows better than to pressure me into doing what I really don't want to do. He only expresses a hope that I'll change my mind.

It's just that I'm concerned about past experience plus what I keep seeing over and over in these postings and in the online articles about psychopaths. During any contact you have with them, they use it to gather info to use against you. It does not seem possible to behave in such a way that they can't find something useful, and that you are Teflon. If you talk, they record every word in their memory banks and twist it. If you're quiet, you're being snooty or keeping something secret. If you talk to everyone else in the room except them, that does not go over too well. Plus -- I'm not too thrilled about having the rest of the family staring at us oddly because the Psychopaths told them things about us that are totally untrue.

Well, except for the Psychopath sister-in-law. She won't even look at me, much less speak to me. And she thinks that makes me pay!? HA HA HA HA!

Soooooo, if you can't stay completely away, what's a good way to behave to minimize the fall-out?

blue heron


Edited by blueheron (11/13/11 04:11 PM)
Edit Reason: typo

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#12272 - 11/14/11 07:15 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
1Healing Offline
member

Registered: 10/25/11
Posts: 87
blueheron,

Maybe if you have things well thought out in your head as psychopaths are, for themselves, in their nature, maybe go in with what you want out of the dinner/holiday. Perhaps write a list, are there things you want to know about others, ancestry questions, etc.? Maybe take a portable dvd player, Ipod, cd player, ANYTHING to distract if things get tense. My b in law used to spend a lot of holidays staring at his iphone/computer.. Now I would say that some of that was more about him, & his own uncomfortableness.. he hasn't been doing that as much lately .. but I think it's almost a given that any lack or awkward moments are often filled with overuse of personal electronics.. I'd say borrow one if you don't have one, for the occassion! take the headset too just in case or a set of earplugs?
When ex h would go in his rage modes (often) with me it was so hurtful that at times I would put earplugs in so I didn't have to hear him. Go prepared.. whatever that means.. Maybe? if you can plan something exciting for after the holidays so you are thinking not only about that.. say.. ok if I make it through this I will reward myself with.... Perhaps a journal book to write in / maybe if they make you nervous pull out your notepad to take some notes.. LOL
like a therapist would.. ya know? hee hee..
maybe some goofy looking glasses.. give them something to talk about.
Oh the aftermath.. I'm still way far from healed & it's been so difficult to get grounded..I'm not looking that forward to the holidays frankly. I love my family so much.. but I still am not where I need to be as to regrouping from my losses.. I may not spend a huge amt of time w/family myself, maybe dinner & a bit after or before..
If there is a store open /nearby on the day perhaps you can go out & do some pre Christmas shopping.. Perhaps it's the personal structure we are needing with this type of thing.
That is something most people rely on normally in life but Psychopaths just do not adhere to any of that.. so either affected by them or around them currently / one needs to maintain continuity..
Maybe I'll start a holiday journal book just to keep myself organized in my own mind...
You have me thinking blue heron. smile

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#12287 - 11/15/11 05:21 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: 1Healing]
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Good thoughts, 1healing. Thought provoking, because I haven't gotten to the calm point of thinking of some of what you've said.

Hmm, suppose I could always stay in the corner and play board games with the great grandkids on Thanksgiving. That could work.

Thanks. You helped.

blue heron

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#12299 - 11/16/11 09:39 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
1Healing Offline
member

Registered: 10/25/11
Posts: 87
You're welcome! smile I know in my own family once in a great while there will be a time or so when I have had to think hard about how to get through this in a literal fashion/ with my parent's aging now & there is more stress for all of us lately, but I was thinking too of how to get past a family gathering if/when it seems tense & the technology which can be rude, at times yet if there are some or one who are playing that game then why not? meaning being rude... Puzzle books, computers, even ancestry books or family pictures, anything to distract.. I think the family gatherings can be stressful even in good times, to a degree, so having ideas of focus, outside of the relationships themselves.. Yes, board games etc...
Maybe even take a camera, don't psychopaths love to have their pics taken? ex h did..
he loved cameras & filming.. but maybe do things/ ideas where one has it planned ahead.. leave no gaps /come baring gifts (they love presents too smile. Kill em with kindness.. !!!
Maybe a honey pot too.. lol.. seriously if it's love they can't deal with/ then flipping it to be in their face with the love/ but come from so many directions & distractions of potential that they don't have time to think as to interceptions of, "the love." kinda like hooville for The Grinch.

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#12356 - 11/24/11 03:37 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Okay, today's Thanksgiving report.

Actually, it started yesterday when husband and I were at the community cafeteria. A lady walks up to us and asks if we are the [last name]s, and I said yes. She asks if we're the ones having the big Thanksgiving lunch in the community rec room, and I said, "Well, I don't know! I don't have a clue ..." (I thought the gathering was going to be next door at MIL's.) And it went from there. Nobody tells us anything.

As of this morning, we still did not know when Thanksgiving dinner was supposed to start. After calling and begging a couple of people to please tell us (they didn't know either), we were referred to the head Psychopath herself, who said that everybody knows what time it is, it is always the same time every year. Damn. And what time would that be? Well, 2 o'clock! As if we're idiots.

So 12:45 rolls around, and we get a phone call. I have just climbed out of the shower with wet hair, and my husband is fiddling around with a shirt he's going to wear. He picks up the phone, and gets: "Well, everybody's here! Where are you? We're going to start in a minute! Oh, and by the way, keep an eye out for your niece, she's driving 4 hours to come be with us."

At that point, I was about to start throwing fruit salad in every direction.

Our niece usually stays with us when she visits. But we were not expecting anyone, so our home is all "lived-in," and the room she would be staying in is a disaster (because it's my room and somehow the catch-all room). There are no clean sheets and the bathroom is the pits. And there is absolutely no time to clean it up.

So after I have a conniption over that, husband finds out that niece is staying next door. Bless her poor heart. He also goes and talks with somebody and finds out that no, everybody is not there yet, all the food's not there yet, including the grandson with the turkey.

I ended up staying away until just before they said the blessing, and I ate my meal quietly. Then somebody had the bright idea of going around the room and having everyone say what they were thankful for. And I was conveniently and very pointedly passed by, by MIL who was running that show. It's probably a good thing, because I'd have told them I was very thankful God had given me the eyes to see who my MIL and SIL really are. So after I complimented the brother-in-law who did the bulk of the cooking, the nephew who fried the turkey, and took my plate to the trash, I slipped out the back door and walked home. I could not watch that family struggling to make nice for five more minutes.

Think I'll play the piano for a while ... and take something for my stomach.

Happy Thanksgiving

blue heron

Note: The niece never showed up. I bet she had no idea she was supposed to be coming here. But it sure put my stomach in a knot! Chaos! They love it.


Edited by blueheron (11/24/11 06:31 PM)

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#12360 - 11/24/11 07:14 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
1Healing Offline
member

Registered: 10/25/11
Posts: 87
Blueheron, happy thanksgiving & you made it thru.
I'll keep this short, my brother & his family are stopping over in a bit..
Well they say that dark is repelled by The Light so maybe that was a good sign you were passed by.
smile

Oh my I can't wait till Jesus Comes back.
I think too when people act like your MIL did to you it says a lot more about them than it does about you!

Take care!


Edited by 1Healing (11/24/11 07:25 PM)

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#12361 - 11/24/11 11:26 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: 1Healing]
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Thanks, 1Healing, I hope your brother's visit was enjoyable and that it brought you good things.

My husband is like you -- he waits for Jesus' return daily. He's sick of all the craziness. Not just in our family.

blue heron

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#12362 - 11/24/11 11:41 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Something else that really hurt me today.

For the short time I was at the dinner, I ended up at the end of a long table, close to a grand-niece, and one of SIL's young sons and his wife. I set my plate down and offered a hello with some small pleasantries and a question asking how they were. I have liked them, didn't have anything against them because of their mother, and was hoping to find out what they were doing lately.

And they just talked on top of me like I wasn't there.

So when a small lull came along, I tried again, and nobody replied anything to me.

Then I said, slightly louder, "Is something wrong with my voice today? Is my voice hearable?"

And without looking at me, they said, "Oh, we hear you." And they went on eating and talking to others.

That hurts almost worse than anything else that happened today, because it tells me that SIL has been telling them things. And God only knows what.

I'm sure a lot of you can fill in the blanks. My imagination is running wild. I can see how easy it is for the psychopath to make sure you are the one who looks bad, crazy, etc.

I don't know if it is worth my effort to ask them what on earth they have heard, and see why they didn't check it out to see if it's true. But I don't guess my side of the story is worth a plugged nickel.

Ptooey.

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#12364 - 11/25/11 03:10 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
1Healing Offline
member

Registered: 10/25/11
Posts: 87
blueheron, Yes, not just related to family/ relationships, etc as to JESUS Coming Back..
the whole world is just way out there now/ economy etc...


Do you have to see MIL & SIL in between holidays? What about.. a St. Benedict's cross.. isn't that the exorcism crucifix? perhaps next gathering you could get a large one & wear it during the meal! smile

What if you sign up to help at a shelter to serve meals next Thanksgiving & just say you are busy helping others WHO NEED & APPRECIATE YOU.


I pray this weekend goes better. Just fyi it is NOT normal to do what they did to you.. you know that but it's good to hear it from others.


Edited by 1Healing (11/25/11 03:11 PM)

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#12366 - 11/25/11 04:04 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: 1Healing]
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Thanks very much, 1Healing. Tender weekend hug to you.

blue heron

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#12367 - 11/25/11 04:19 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Well, I want you all to know that today I am so upset I am about sick. The more I think about what MIL and especially SIL have done, and may have done, and may have planned, the worse I feel.

If I can't get anyone to talk to me and find out what on earth is happening, then we are walking in the dark, into Heaven knows what.

I have worked myself up so much that I am afraid to leave our little home and go see my family for Christmas. I am afraid MIL or SIL will schmooze the management with lies, like how they were supposed to keep watch over our place and go in a few times and check if things are all right, but in our hurry we forgot to give them a key. Or something along those lines. I am concerned that any chance they get, they will go through our papers and valuables and help themselves.

The more I think about it all, the more I wonder if they have something big planned. Not just to take the inheritance away from three of the four children -- that's already happened -- but to take from us what we already own. Hey, we're convenient, eh?

See, I have worked myself up into a frenzy, a headache, chest pains, and if they knew that next door they would be delighted.

I have GOT to find out what is on their agenda, so we can protect ourselves. This is ridiculous.

As an aside to this line of thought, I will confess my malicious feelings yesterday at Thanksgiving dinner, when SIL was serving her plate from the buffet. She all of a sudden started choking, and it sounded pretty serious. And I was sitting there silently rooting for her to keep on choking until she was gone. Good heavens, that is not like me.

blue heron

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#12368 - 11/25/11 04:42 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
1Healing Offline
member

Registered: 10/25/11
Posts: 87
blueheron,

Is there any more you can do to protect your home, papers, etc? Could you install a camera maybe via your computer so if someone did come in you would be able to see, ie, even leaving a computer running with webcam up pointed toward the door while you are gone & watch via another computer.. just ideas.

I have alarms on my doors, they are affordable now, sold almost anywhere (walmart, walgreens, etc). Maybe check into various types.

Can you find some excuse to skip Christmas with them? You put in your, "duty," time with them Thanksgiving.. if it were me I would skip that one under the circumstances. You could say you don't feel well even, which would be a true as to wanting to be there.

Hang in there. Try not to project too much if you can. Just do what you can do NOW.
My own thoughts about everything that is going on in my life now which is incredibly difficult in total.. I tell myself it is also mimicking what is going on in the world/ the magnitude of my losses of all of this.. I hang crosses on doorknobs, use holy oil & blessed salt, say prayer of protection.. the spiritual peace is important in all of this I think too/ there is only so much one Can do, & I keep saying to self, God's In Charge/ bigger picture/ etc...

She can't touch your spirit & soul!

Hugs.

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#12376 - 11/27/11 06:38 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
Dianne E. Offline

Administrator
member

Registered: 11/15/02
Posts: 2788
Loc: United States
Hi blue heron, I am sorry for you having to be the odd one out as far as the conversation, seems pretty clear the others have accepted the lies about you and your husband.

Just a thought, how about writing up a contract of sorts for the managers and have them sign it that under no condition is ANYONE allowed in your home. Give them a cell number that they can reach you 24/7 in the event there is some emergency that only management is allowed in to handle. I would also install a camera to watch from online. It would be a shame after such an unspeakable Thanksgiving to not enjoy Christmas with your family. Is your family a long ways away? Maybe even a short visit might lift your spirits. I am truly sorry for all of this. Since my mother has passed away I really don't have any relatives unless you call my brother and sister relatives, they don't even bother to call. In some ways I am glad, they bring back too many ugly thoughts. I am glad that at least you have your family that loves you and hope you can figure out a way to even see them for a short visit just to be around normal loving people who care deeply for you.

Have you thought more about contacting an attorney to at least know if you have any rights? Or an elder abuse group in the event your FIL was not in his right state of mind while signing legal documents?

Di

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#12377 - 11/28/11 12:25 AM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: Dianne E.]
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Hello, Dianne,

We are getting the name of an attorney this week. Since we are so new to this area, we don't know who is known for handling such matters. But a professional in the community has recommended someone to us; we just need to get the particulars. Yes, we really do need to know where things stand and if we have any claim on the estate. Even if we didn't get a penny, I would be happy to see SIL under the jail for her felonies. At this point I don't care how unfit for jail she is.

As for taking a trip, I think we must do it for our own sanity. It's a thousand miles each way. My family has its shortcomings, but they are royalty compared to this! We will write a letter to the management asking them to allow no one into our unit no matter what they say, etc., and ask them to keep a copy of it or a note about it on their desk so all three people who run that desk will be reminded. The camera thing is an excellent idea, but not sure how to do all that. Guess a little research is in order. I don't have a whole bunch of time for that, but ...

People can rest assured I will never spend another holiday (or any other day) with the in-laws again.

I hate to hear you have siblings that don't keep in touch, and know holidays are never the same once a parent is gone. We need to treat ourselves kindly during the holidays.

Thanks much,
blue heron

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#12379 - 11/28/11 11:41 AM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: blueheron]
Dianne E. Offline

Administrator
member

Registered: 11/15/02
Posts: 2788
Loc: United States
Hi blue heron, thanks for you kind words. I have my "kids", my dogs are the best relatives, they are always happy to be with me so I am thankful for their love.

There is some information about nanny cams, if I were going to get one I would probably do the smoke detector but since you are under management they might notice. Ebay had the best prices, you want something with audio and that you can log on to view and hear.

I would have the manager also sign the paperwork, puts more teeth into it and shows you are serious. If you find an attorney I would have them write up a letter to give to management so they know they are crossing a legal line if they let anyone into your space. You need to be able to go away and rest and be vague about when you are coming and going.

I would think any elder abuse organization might have some referrals for attorneys since this is a specialty area of the law.

Personally I would take any paperwork or computers with you just to be on the safe side. If you can't pick up a smoke detector cam then you can get a really small one to hide focused on the door.

If you don't have roadside insurance I use Allstate Motor Club, you can pay monthly and you will have to read the fine print but I don't think you are committed to a contract so you could just have it in case you run into any problems on the road. It is a great service and would be worth a months payment (around $10). I use it here because just the price of one tow and it pays for itself.

I'll go get the link and post it in a sec.

Di

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#12380 - 11/28/11 12:17 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: Dianne E.]
Dianne E. Offline

Administrator
member

Registered: 11/15/02
Posts: 2788
Loc: United States
Allstate Motor Club

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Personal Assist 24/7 Concierge
Road Hazard Program: $250 Benefit†
24-HOUR EMERGENCY SERVICE
Roadside Assistance: $250 Benefit
Road and Towing Service
Tire Change Service
Fuel Delivery
Lockout Service
On-Time Arrival Guarantee
Trip Interruption: $1500 Benefit
Arrest Bond Certificate: $2000 Benefit *
1Pricing will vary by state


Our new Platinum Elite plan offers exclusive benefits you won't find at other motor clubs:
Road Hazard Program: † - Tire and wheel damage repair on the road
Personal Assist - Live, 24/7 concierge service
My AutoExpert™ Repair and Referral Services
CARFAX® Vehicle History Reports™

Quick and Exceptional Emergency Roadside Assistance for you and your family. 24/7.
You and your spouse (or other household adult) are eligible for benefits in any non-commercial vehicle. Even your 16 to 18 year old teenagers receive Emergency Roadside Assistance benefits for no additional cost!
We'll get you back on the road...fast!

Need a jump-start? A tire changed? We'll cover eligible emergency services up to $250. With over 35,000 service providers in our nationwide network and our On-Time Arrival Guarantee, you'll receive the help you need.

Getting stranded interrupts your life. We'll ease the hassles.
If you are more than 100 miles away from home and can't safely drive your car due to collision or mechanical failure, we offer Trip Interruption reimbursement for certain meal, lodging and transportation expenses up to $1500.
Note: The deluxe plan only covers for if you are in an accident and have to stay somewhere, this is a much better deal in the unlikely event you have mechanical problems.

A little help when you've been pulled over.
Use your $2000 Arrest Bond Certificate* in lieu of cash—or to avoid surrendering your driver's license—if you're arrested for certain moving traffic violations.

We'll make your life easier every day...not only when things go wrong.
Find great rates on airfare and accommodations for destinations all over the world at our full-service online Travel agency. You'll also have access to great savings on rental cars, restaurants, entertainment and more.
EVERY MEMBERSHIP COMES WITH OUR
30-DAY MONEY-BACK SATISFACTION GUARANTEE!
Allstate Motor Club App: We Go Where You Go
Roadside assistance starts with one-touch access on your phone - anytime, anywhere

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#12396 - 12/02/11 08:11 PM Re: Dealing with the holidays [Re: Dianne E.]
blueheron Offline
member

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Thanks for posting that, Dianne. Here's an irony for you. I didn't get to read this group for a day or so. Meanwhile, we traded in two cars for a "new" (used) one, and my husband opted to add a plan similar to the platinum to the monthly car payment. (Then I read your post.) Makes me feel much better.

I'm not sure what prompted you to post that. Great minds ... :-)

Thanks. This group is helping me feel much better. The info and the people. Of course, on nights like tonight, when what I guess is PTSD is flaring up, I still want to go whomp the younger culprit.

blue heron

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