I want to know if anybody here have had this tremendous misfortune.

Hi, welcome to our community. I will be out for most of the day but will check when I get back to find any threads that relate to your situation and hopefully someone who has experience can also respond.

Perhaps in the meantime you might if you are comfortable filling us in on the details, like do you live with her, near her or what your particular situation is like.

Di

Hi StarryWonderz,

I'd also be interested to hear your story.

Hi, here are some links to other members posts about Psychopath mothers:

My Mother

Psychopath Family Members

Saying Good Bye to Mom in more ways than one

My Psychopath Mother and her endless Legacy

My Mother

A Psychopathic Mother

I have a psychopathic birther (in the past called her my mother) All my childhood she watched me suffer from excruciating psychological, emotional, mental and spiritual pain of being sexually abused by her boyfriend. Despite my constantly telling her and everyone in the church ( We were Jehovah's Witnesses and the church covered up the abuse because it did not want a bad name on its organization.) The birther abandoned me on top if it, and even when she saw that I was suicidal at age 11 because of the abuse and neglect she did nothing. She didn't want to do anything to bring me to safety because it would require her giving up her comfortable life style, since she was getting the boyfriend's paychecks every two weeks. In essence she sold me out she sold me into prostitution for her own boyfriend.

She would be cold and stare at me and tell me to shut up. At 33 in 2009 I went to the authorities because there was no statute of limitations in the state it occured. She and her boyfriend attempted to discredit me and have me institutionalized. That's when I realized I needed to sever my ties with her and him. ( I only tolerated him because I had to in order to be around her) So yea it's not easy, but in the past 2 years I've been studying various psychotherapy and Neuro Linguistic Programming books and have been doing my own visualizations and meditations and built up an alternate time to work from, since I had no foundation in family at all.

I've suffered a lot of pain because there was a physical health condition on top of everything that I grew up having to deal with and I had nobody to talk to or help me. For 33 years I was in constant survival mode. The birther never did anything to truly help me. It's been very difficult dealing with this, but I am determined to heal and move on to a uch happier life now that I am slowly integrating and processing the truth.

Hi everybody,

I am a bit reluctant to post in Internet message boards, because people just tear through your words, so if you don't like what I'm saying just ignore the post.
I do not know how to put my story of misfortune in words but I'll try. I only recently discovered that my mother may be a possible psychopath. I always knew there was something wrong with both my parents but I didn't know what. I think discovering is 50% job done but I still have a long way to go. Ever since I remember, my mother wanted to mold me into a person that I was not. She had specific designs for me. What profession I would choose, what way I would dress, whom should I mingle with and with whom I shouldn't even she would tell me how to walk and change my gait.
Unfortunately I did not grow up to be the person she wanted me to be, and this let loose her psycho instincts on me. She would drug my food, in order to change me, she would visit shrinks and tell them her son had gone mad please give me some medicines.
To cut the long story short I faced years of abuse. While I some got used to the physical hardship, the emotional part was tremendous and haunts me to this day. My father though never directly abusive never supported me and always took a submissive stance.
I had no friends. My behavior was bad. My relatives did not like me, I did not like them either because I was taught to hate them. My mother would tell me lullaby stories of how my grandmother had abused her and tormented her, all a bunch of [censored].

My mother put me in mental clinic twice, in 2005 and 2007 but I was released because there was nothing wrong with me.

In late 2008 I started discovering about narcissism and psychopathy and I fully realized that if I have to live I need to escape from home. And in 2009 I did so. I told them that I'm moving to a different city bcoz I had got a job there, but my job was in my same city, I just hid among the huge population in India.

I don't know why I'm still alive today, or what purpose I solve in this world but I feel I can do something for others like me as long as I am alive.

Sorry I made a long post hope I haven't offended anybody or said something silly.

Hello themage, I am very sorry for not welcoming you sooner. Your story is very sad, it is horrible to think of what you have endured.

It is sickening what kind of so called "religion" will do to protect their own image over that of a child in your situation. I don't know much about Jehovah's Witnesses but do understand that it sounds like a cult like environment. I had a couple of relatives who were Christian Scientist followers and they kept a tight handle on them as far as any medical care. My Aunt was one and she died very sad. They do their "healer" thing and by the time she sought medical care the cancer had spread to the point of no return. Her last words to me were that she thought the group was about love and while she was dying only one person visited her and one person sent a card and she was a very active member. I am clearly not an athiest but your story is so very sad what some will do in the name of religion.

I hope we can help support you on your journey toward healing. It is good that you have cut off contact. Did you have any siblings?

I agree that the truth as hard as it is will set you free, be kind to yourself and we are here if you want to talk more, many times writing about your experience helps to clarify things.

Di

Sorry you are going through these things..
I like the idea of studying linguistics.. that has interested me as well over the yrs.
& saying as you do that understanding is 1/2 of the battle is also true. It is hard work to come back from being abused.

As I have lived my life I think I have gained a lot in a spiritual sense, I've grown. But this marriage to now ex h Psychopath, has left my life so upside down from before that still it looks so overwhelming to me. I can relate to your words.

He had all sorts of promises that never came to pass. I was working hard to make things happen & at each step he was undoing it all. In the process it made me look like a fool, then broke, in debt, now divorced, starting over at midlife & also I'm disabled. Throw all of these things one goes through in this type of situation together it can be devastating & take quite a few yrs to get on top of.

He has been gone 2 yrs & I am just now beginning to tackle the social aspect of the losses/devastation that was left behind.. It's not easy. I'm physically disabled & I have been dependent upon my connections in life to keep me afloat. It's vital for healthy living to have well rounded connections/plugged into others.. they make sure to undo all of these things by the chaos, confusion that they live. It feels so much like being pushed off a cliff / or left out to sea.. the magnitude is surreal of it all.

When I think of the divorce, then having to deal with my financial losses (of which I still will be for a yr), these in the beginning seemed so huge, time consuming, psychologically as well .. not to mention all the other left face in this. I guess what I do believe is that what comes around goes around, I think when a person sets out to hurt someone as this is, eventually they will meet their Maker. The decisions one makes in life does matter... I think it does become clear after a time that they don't change (it seems) .. the ones in their path are in line of fire. I still feel my breath taken away from it all. My prayers for 2012 are that I can finally reunite in a more cohesive fashion again with easier access to others .. (as this is my challenge at the moment in my limitations physically) & begin to heal in more depth this way.

Too, what I see clearly (I believe) is the way society is like this, the dysfunction/false ways of which it functions in this top /down manner.. the psychopath / that I knew & seemingly this is how I am understanding the false that it is (psycho pathology) .. it's NOT about love, the nature of, is one where things come very easily to this person, "in the world," often they are highly intelligent, successful at several things (able to make money fairly easily), charismatic (can work a room or people).. but they are aloplastic because this is not who they are, this is not where their heart aligns, their emotions detach; they then work to latch on, in an immature nature /this feeding off of, others.. then the chaos, lies, anger, continual in & out of people's lives, destroying instead of building.

In an idealistic society it would be incorporating, building, making sure noone is left behind. They undercut this, by their nature.

He saw the answer I think but didn't even understand the question..he is forever at a place of take, there's no need to give. My life is not of such luxuries, it never has been, I am comfortable .. yet in all of this I have been stripped as never before, it feels a raping of the soul as nothing he had said was allowed to play out to fruition, he vanished & left with the goods (he never made good on his pt of debt/ & meaning my life as before he stole from me as he had no intention of staying). The world is in upheaval now, there's a top /down nature to how it works, God Is not like this, He Is Love & there will come a day soon things will change. The heart does not lie, at least not to God, He Sees All. I turn to HIM, who heals my wounds, He Is my Father.
I yet feel I'm at the bottom of the cliff/out to sea, the physical world around me is finally aligning(thank GOD ), but the details of my life are not yet tied back together.. it will take yrs. They sheer off the self/he cannot hurt me, God In Heaven Shields me from harm; their development is arrested /to forgive is Divine; God Help me.
My heart goes out to you.. There will come a day of Justice & time heals all wounds.
I also read a scripture in The Bible the other day that said, follow, "a fool & your life will be destroyed." well that about sums it up for me in this. I so pray for healing.

StarryWonderz, I didn't see a direct reply to your post about your experience, and wanted to say how sad I was to see what you lived through. What you wrote was not too long, and you said nothing silly. I hope you will keep writing it out, because it helps.

I am glad you have been able to get away and start living. That is wonderful courage.

blue heron

Thank you