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#13022 - 04/09/12 12:20 AM My story
vusly Offline
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Registered: 11/14/11
Posts: 7
Years ago my brother married a woman who our family liked immediately. Within a short time though, a few things started happening that made us wonder about her, such as a fire in their kitchen through which she was able to claim enough insurance to buy a very expensive lounge suite etc. and the show off about to us all. Not long afterwards my father found out my brother had been forging cheques in my Dads name. When questioned my brother said he had been forced to by his wife. She was spending too much and he couldn't pay for it. my brother had awlways been a soft touch. As we are a very honest family this caused my father great grief. he had a heart attack and died a week later.

My sister inlaw had also at that time been spreading terrible lies about my parents. During our grieving period she was actively telling lies to my mothers friends about my mother, who is a very gentle sweet woman. Over the years my sister inlaw managed to put a wedge between my brother and all his siblings. Iam keeping this post brief but there were numerous times when this sister inlaw caused us all great pain through her various lies.
My brother slowly became a very ill person, he had heart problems which were heightened by the kind of food he and his wife ate.His wife continued to spend too much. My brother had inherited my fathers farm and he was forced to sell some of the land. Eventually he was on dialysis because of kidney failure.

He turned 50 last November. As his wife was not going to throw him a party we thought we would surprise him and visit for lunch, taking our lunch with us. My brother was really happy to see us all. We sat down to eat lunch. All of a sudden my brother left the table as his wife had called him. When he came back he told us all that our sister inlaw was angry with us for not telling her about the surprise visit. he said we shouldl leave. He was angry with us, not her so some of us got up to leave. Two of my sisters went to talk to the sister in law. Then she started yelling at them and stormed out of the house swearing. Some of us quickly left. Two sisters stayed behind to calm my brother down. They said that the sister in law eventually came back and not realising they were still there came back, laughing as if nothing had happened.

Four days later, my brother died. Only once did I see my sister in law shed a tear and that was when her boss came to show his respect. She gave him a very long, smoochy hug. After the funeral my mother very kindly has let sist inlaw stay at her house. But when we go and visit mum sister inlaw gets very agitated and there is some sort of reaction every time. For example she has told us not to talk to her children ever. Last week after I had spent a lovely day with my mother, I got home to hear the phone ringing. When I picked it up it was my sister in law ringing to inform me that it was us siblings who had caused my brother's death. I still haven't finished grieving for my brother and am unable to deal with such whacko behaviour. My mother is unable to tell her to leave her house as she is concerned about my brother's children.


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#13023 - 04/09/12 08:17 AM Re: My story [Re: vusly]
Liz123 Offline
member

Registered: 04/04/12
Posts: 44
Oh Vusly,
I am so sorry to hear your story about the untimely death of your brother and the unhealthy ways of your sister in law. Please accept my sincere sympathy at your loss.

Yes, she sounds like a true Psychopath. How do you protect yourself and your mother, seem like key questions. Kind of surprised that your mother let SIL stay at her house. Is there a reason? Does she not have her own home?

I dont know if you will get any insight reading my post on Psychopath brother, but maybe it will help.

If you are an open and honest person it is so difficult to be around the disordered.

Thinking of you and sending a big hug.
Liz

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#13025 - 04/09/12 10:11 AM Re: My story [Re: vusly]
Dianne E. Offline

Administrator
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Registered: 11/15/02
Posts: 2788
Loc: United States
Hi Vusly, welcome to our community. What a horrible ordeal.

Clearly I am not a Dr. but the first thing that comes to my mind is poison. Did your brother have a life insurance policy?

There is a specific method that I won't list here but have seen several stories about Psychopaths who killed and that was their method. The test for this type of poison just got discovered a few years back and unless it is in question, they normally don't test for it.

I would be very worried about her living with your mother. Please know I am not trying to be an alarmist but that was my first thought when reading your story.

Di


Edited by Dianne E. (04/09/12 10:12 AM)
Edit Reason: typo

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#13026 - 04/10/12 02:04 AM Re: My story [Re: Dianne E.]
vusly Offline
member

Registered: 11/14/11
Posts: 7
My brother and sis in law had moved in with my mum and dad before they had kids as my brother realised he wasn't coping with her alone. Before he died my dad changed his will. As he was originally from India my Dad should have followed Indian tradition and left everything to his son. But as he didn't want my sis in law to get her hands on anything he left everything in a trust to my brother's descendents. The rest of us are girls, so we didn't get anything. We didn't contest the will as we were grief stricken and also didn't want to cause friction with my brother. My dad was not to know that my brother's kids would be girls anyway. Both of these girls get everything. This is also a bitter pill to swallow as us girls had worked so hard on the farm as kids.

I didn't like to think she actually did anything like poison my brother but other strange things have occurred previously. For example, while my brother was still around my mother and him had a home invasion the weekend my sister in law and her daughters went skiing for the weekend.

I really want to get her out of mum's house but my sisters all think we should wait until my mother says she is ready. I am worried this will be too late.

Have even thought about hiring a private eye to prove that sis in law is up to no good. She is very clever and many people (until they clash with her) think she's wonderful.
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#13027 - 04/10/12 02:05 AM Re: My story [Re: Liz123]
vusly Offline
member

Registered: 11/14/11
Posts: 7
Yes it was your story that prompted me to write as well. Its very helpful thanks.
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vusly

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#13081 - 04/18/12 02:52 AM Re: My story [Re: Dianne E.]
vusly Offline
member

Registered: 11/14/11
Posts: 7
Just wondering if the poison you mention affects the heart. My brother kept getting a pain in his chest and ended up in hospital from it acouple of times but the doctor said he was not having a heart attack.
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#13082 - 04/18/12 10:13 AM Re: My story [Re: vusly]
Dianne E. Offline

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Registered: 11/15/02
Posts: 2788
Loc: United States
Hi, poison can have a serious effect on the organs. The cases I have read about in the past the poison is given over a period of time, that throws things off because it appears for awhile that the person is suffering from things that don't make people as suspicious when they die. It is a ghastly way to kill someone and clearly only a Psychopath could do such an act and watch the other person be in such agony.

One of Ann Rule's books Bitter Harvest is a harrowing story about a highly intelligent woman who was an MD married to a MD. She poisoned him, he lived but is still in some pretty serious shape, luckily he got away before she did him in. She was convicted because when he refused to return to her she set the house on fire with the children inside.

The reason poison came to mind was because of your brothers kidney failure. Clearly the heart would also be compromised. Please know that I am not trying to scare anyone but when you dealing with a sophisticated Psychopath it is hard to tell the lengths they will go to for revenge and money.

It would take a pretty cold and calculating person to poison another because done over time leads to some pretty serious medical issues.

At what age will his children inherit the estate? Who is the executor? Was your brother cremated or buried?

Di

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#13091 - 04/20/12 02:23 AM Re: My story [Re: Dianne E.]
vusly Offline
member

Registered: 11/14/11
Posts: 7
I appreciate your reply.

My brother's kids get their inheritance when they turn 21 which, for the older one will be in 4 years.

Over the years my brother had problems with all of his major organs.

I wouldn't like to think poison was involved but it's hard to know what goes on in sis in law's head. I don't think she would be intelligent enough to know which poison to use.
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#13093 - 04/20/12 10:31 AM Re: My story [Re: vusly]
Dianne E. Offline

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Registered: 11/15/02
Posts: 2788
Loc: United States
Hi vsula, I am sorry your brother had so many health problems.

Personally I wouldn't underestimate your sil, anyone can read a good true crime book and figure out poisons etc.

I lost most of what we should have inherited so I can understand how hard it can be, most of my mothers money went to her husbands drug addict daughter.

I am not sure if I asked but did your brother have a life insurance policy?

Did your brother have health issues before he got married?

Di

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#13097 - 04/21/12 01:09 AM Re: My story [Re: Dianne E.]
vusly Offline
member

Registered: 11/14/11
Posts: 7
Hi Diane,
actually my brother didn't have health probs before he got married. But all of the family have inherited high blood pressure and related probs. Even tho we are not overweight etc. So we've always assumed all his health issues stemmed from this. However he had far worse health than the rest of us siblings.

I honestly don't know if he had life insurance or not. Sil has ended up with shares in the co. my dad set up tho ans she continues to spend without restraint.

I presume the executor of the will is the lawyer my dad had used. I'm not really sure.

I really just want to get Sil out of my mum's house. I feel that mum is acting like an abuse victim and although she hates Sil she is too scared to tell her to leave. She also thinks she needs to look after her granddaughters. I somehow have to convince mum that it will be ok if she asks Sil to leave.

Is it too late to get a private eye involved ( to find out about poisoning etc)?
Any ideas?
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