When i was with the most horrific person on this planet, i was blamed for everything that ever happened, before and after i left him. i had often wondered, why am i so messed up? why do i always seem to screw everything up? I finally started to realize, it's not me, it's him and his crazy way of thinking about me! he had a child, a lil girl with a woman before we got together. They had been split-up, she had left him and it wasn't a good thing either.
I had never really thought of the things he had said about her, until it dawned on me that he was treating me the same way he had her.He had given me the idea that this woman had hurt him and broke him down into little pieces, awwww! he made me feel sorry for him and think of him as the victim in the relationship. I had believed all of it to, for a while anyways. i finally saw the light of day and knew what the real deal was the whole time.
Not only had it been the "babys momma" it was also a wife, one that had divorced him. So, he laid it on pretty thick, all the blame was pointed at them, for his sorrow in his life, he had done nothing but got up with the wrong women, awwwww.Now the blame was handed down to me, to be weighted down with. i cought pure hell from him and this game of rage he so loved to play with women. it took me so long to leave him, then i did, for goofd the last time. i always felt so good when i would get the balls to leave him and have some time away from his mouth. it was a feeling i wanted to always have, a feeling of freedom. i finally got that feeling again, after coming back to him, i was so miserable with him. i couldn't even fake being happy with him, i was so unhappy. i loathed him in every way possible.i hated to even hear his voice. when i did finally leave, he would find out my cell# and call me, still playing the blame game as usual.
A few weeks ago, he was screaming in the background, while i was talking to our son on the phone, still mad at me for leaving him. he has the ugliest mouth, so foul and disrespectful i have ever expereinced in my entire life. i will no longer tolerate being treated like that ever again, by anyone! The same woman, he was running around on me with is still with him now, that has been almost 20 years ago they started messing around. She moved in with him when i left him in 2001, now she knows what it's like to be with someone like that. i feel bad for her, even though she hurt me years ago. i really didn't love him, i was always controlled and told what my feelings were, how i was to feel about him. I was to treat him like a king. i was to be submissive, when i couldn't be, it wasn't in me to be at all. I think she to feels trapped by him. she's kinda uneducated and he makes her feel very low. she has no more self-aseetm.
That is just what he needs to feel like he wants to feel. when some strong woman, like hillary Clinton was to come-up on the t.v, he gets really mad, says that's not a womans roll, that's a mans job. he is very strict on women and what they should or shouldn't do. i always hated people like that. i do know how and why i ended up with him, i also know it will never, ever happen again. Some things you learn in life, this was a lesson i fully understood. i now have the knowledge and the right amount of skills to know what to look for in someone. I know people can fool you, trick you into making you think good about them....they can't hide their true side for very long, the monster will show it's ugly head in a short time, he always does.the blame is always never pointed at ones self, not with some one like that, it's never their fault! anyone you know, who is like that, than run as fast as you can from them, they will hurt you bad if they can.
They seem to get-off on hurting people and causing harm to good folks.