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#17073 - 03/25/18 12:25 PM Am I the Psychopath or is he?
Jenni123 Offline
member

Registered: 03/21/18
Posts: 1
I am in the process of "No Contact". Without going into all the same details everyone else has experienced....Adoration, love bombing, devaluation...I am trying to work through our tumultuous history to determine if I carry some of the same traits as my ex-psychopath. As he devalued me with less and less texts, calls and his charming personality, I grew angrier...first questioning him on what was wrong. Of course I got the same response every time "Nothing is wrong, I'm busy, in a bad mood, work sucks", etc. As it went on, it got to the point of me sending lengthy, thought-felt but wordy texts detailing why I felt he was treating me differently then in the beginning of our relationship. He'd never respond or would respond with one or two word answers when I barraged him with questions. Then I would get furious, calling him names and flying off the handle. I was trying to get him to understand he was treating me crappy, but I now know he didn't care what I felt. The fact that I also tried to manipulate him into treating me better bothers me. I feel the rage that I projected on him because of his devaluation of me makes me the one who is the emotional manipulator...???? I am seeing a therapist now and I will be asking if she is experienced in Narcissistic abuse, since I feel that type of therapist would help me to sort this out. Anyone else feel this way when confronted with looking back on your relationship?

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#17074 - 03/26/18 08:00 PM Re: Am I the Psychopath or is he? [Re: Jenni123]
DadofRad Offline

member

Registered: 07/18/14
Posts: 124
I'm not sure I understand your questions. Tell us more about your story. How did this psychopath treat you? Did he try to make you feel everything was your fault?

Did he take responsibility for any of the problems in the relationship? Was he ever able to admit fault or mistakes? Did he ever show real emotion (outside of anger or contrived sadness to elicit sympathy)? Did he have a conscience, ability to show empathy or regret? If the answers to these are no, then you may be dealing with a psychopath? If this guy was a psychopath, don't waist time feeling guilty or asking what blame you had. A relationship with a psychopath is doomed because they are incapable of having a relationship outside of controlling you. The only fault a victim should be thinking of is why did you continue to let yourself be victimized?


Edited by DadofRad (03/26/18 08:10 PM)

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