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#12332 - 11/21/11 09:47 PM Re: What motivates the psychopath ? [Re: ]
Dianne E. Offline


Registered: 11/15/02
Posts: 2789
Loc: United States
I am sorry that you felt someone had made you think you weren't being treated with respect and validation that any member deserves. I hope you will email me to let me know why and how I can help you. I must have missed what you are reading.

I will honor your request to remove your registration. I sincerely apologize if you have been harmed I don't think anyone here would do so intentionally.


#12333 - 11/22/11 05:18 AM Re: What motivates the psychopath ? [Re: Anonymous]
starry Offline

Registered: 01/06/11
Posts: 350
Originally Posted By: mpath
Hi Dianne,

The reason for not discussing my experience publicly is for my own safety. Even changing names and locations wouldn't be sufficient. Apparently one of your members thinks that I am a Psychopath so I will take leave here. I have been through enough, thank you. If you will please unregister me. I wish you all well.

I think that person might have misunderstood your username, and just seen the 'path' part of it.

It's 'mpath', as in 'empath', as in 'an empathetic person' (as opposed to a psychopath).

#12343 - 11/23/11 11:18 PM Re: What motivates the psychopath ? [Re: JustAMan]
blueheron Offline

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 84
Oh, I'm so sorry the empath misunderstood what was said. Because I was going to introduce myself to them; I'm an empath too. (I wonder if autocorrect might have done something to the postings ... I remember trying several times to say s o c i o path, and it always corrected itself to say psychopath. As though there are no other "paths" but psychopaths.)

Dianne, I don't know if you can invite the empath back, but we could try to explain and make them welcome.

There are a lot of things swirling through my mind at the moment about how much more difficult it is dealing with a psychopath when you can actually feel them, see them, read them. But you have to be on top of your game to do it, and they seem to know when you are seeing them. They'll stay away from someone who can slice right through and see their black, empty heart. That is, unless they can mess things up for them first somehow. Create chaos. I think an empath is probably the psychopath's greatest, most fun challenge. Let's see if we can fool the seer and cause them to never want to look inside another person ever again. Let's kill them somehow. Kill their spirit, their trust, their care.

Anyway! I have been off of here for several days, and every day dreading Thanksgiving. Even now I do not know what I will decide to do tomorrow. I may end up going to eat by myself at the cafeteria. I am not sure I want to endure the baloney tomorrow.

1Healing, I loved your most recent post. "I will tell you I would NOT want to be him when it comes to judgement day." Yes, heat up another rotisserie for this one, as my husband would say. (grin) Truly, the scriptures say there is an extra measure of judgment for fake shepherds who dupe God's children.

And this describes a psychopath so eloquently in a nutshell: "They walk one up a mountain & the view is immense / then when one is in a relaxed state of being & taking in the fresh air, feeling accomplished by their side, they coyly shove one off the mountain top & watch as they fall.."

Of course. And as you fall, you hear them say it was your fault somehow, that you caused them to have to do that. That is one I will never understand. (It's never true.)

Well! It is way past my husband's bed time, yet here he comes shuffling out of the bedroom saying he could not go to sleep because the more he thinks about tomorrow's big dinner with the Psychopath step-mother, the angrier he gets. So he got up to do something distracting.

And what I told him surprised me. Thanks to this little group, all the stories, and the great information -- I realized we no longer had to be emotionally running from all of this, didn't have to be on the defensive, thinking "Wah! I can't stand this any more! I can't take it!" No, we can stop running, be proactive, and choose to say, "I don't WANT to subject my emotions to that chaos tomorrow. Why should I? My mental health is too important."

Now that decision can take three forms. (1) We can go to the dinner for a tiny little appearance, and at the very first sign of bull**** (which starts up pretty quick), just smile, wave goodbye to a couple of the nice folks, and quietly disappear, unnoticed in all that stupid chaos. Or (2) we can spread a little chaos of our own about how certain unnamed others in the family have been sworn to secrecy over some unnamed things about "you" (whoever you are), and see how that plays out (nyah hah hah). Or (3) we can fail to show up at all. Hey, there will be repercussions whichever way we choose, so why not do what we like.

Okay, that's all my rambling on this thread for now. I'm going to stop and sit down with my husband and ask him if he can spell out specifically what makes him so angry that he cannot sleep.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone.
blue heron

#12345 - 11/23/11 11:51 PM Re: What motivates the psychopath ? [Re: blueheron]
1Healing Offline

Registered: 10/25/11
Posts: 87
Blueheron.. thank you smile & empath.. yes. I can relate. I am sensitive & accused at times of being overly so.. those that truely know me see the reasonsing for it..
I think to me what SO sets these people apart is how they do destroy & purposed. they are way above LOVE & working out /or on anything..
I still feel very numb to what he did to me, I keep saying I am disabled but my gosh /this piece is what I am up against.. First few yrs were the legal issues I was forced into/divorce, bankruptcy because of this..
I guess in my mind... a normal or non psychopath person would want to work out/ or somehow have good feelings about.. but it seems like they thrive on the hate!
They don't understand an empath because they are devoid of emotions.

It's strange but I am feeling my life is in danger from him..
Yes, it's about judgement day & I feel God Showed me what that was about a yr ago..
he will be dealing with GOD. He can't steal my soul. He got most everything else.
as to love.. why do they bother saying anything... his words were empty.

& I believe in purgatory.. from what I have read there are levels/ some are close to hell...
I guess I am trying very hard to live a life pleasing to God so this has all been very difficult.. I know he could care less.. he does whatever he wants to do & he only says he's Christian but his actions are opposite.. which is where I just have to let go.

Happy thanksgiving..

Edited by 1Healing (11/23/11 11:58 PM)

#12346 - 11/24/11 12:09 AM Re: What motivates the psychopath ? [Re: blueheron]
1Healing Offline

Registered: 10/25/11
Posts: 87
Blueheron, I pray things go well tomorrow. Maybe focus on the food.. what about black friday? Can you pick up a paper to read if you do go?
Maybe tell her you are camped out at Best Buy so you can't make it!

This is all so freakin weird with the Psychopaths.. noone has EVER comeinto my life prior who in turn so hated me (who orig SO wanted to be with me.. till he was then he SO wanted to be away from me.. ON & ON ????????!!!!!!!!).. & I am a NICE PERSON! my gosh.. on occassions if someone upsets me I can't hold onto it too long/ I HAVE To smile & be happy. I think probably I didn't know the person at all/ it was an illusion as others say..
but that's so hard to really grasp. God's In Charge..

#13649 - 08/01/12 01:14 PM Re: What motivates the psychopath ? [Re: JustAMan]
Lisa Rosenbaum Offline

Registered: 02/26/12
Posts: 13

Nature/nurture go hand in hand when it comes to the alien predator. One has to wonder how a mother responds when she has to deal with a baby psychopath. They are probably hard to bond with...aloof and weird. The mother may be responding to the psychopath pushing her away, as much as the other way around. The psycho feels easily smothered and controlled and if there is a strong genetic component...that kind of aggression and wilfulness is hardwired before birth.

The predator who targeted me, was probably born that way. His family was intact and seemed loving enough and quite typical from all accounts. All families are a little dysfunctional. His was no more or less than anybody else I've gotten to know well.

#13651 - 08/01/12 01:55 PM Re: What motivates the psychopath ? [Re: nonat]
Lisa Rosenbaum Offline

Registered: 02/26/12
Posts: 13
Originally Posted By: nonat
I felt the energy drain for years. I started to observe and figured it out. When everyone get settled, the Psychopath is saying, "time to go." when everyone is working on project talks everyone into taking a break. Yes the sadism thing I'm not sure about. Psychopaths certainly do horrible hurtful stuff to people. Stuff which we generally label as 'sadistic'. Whether what actually motivates the Psychopath to do this stuff is sadism or something else is what I'm unsure about.

Psychopaths certainly do horrible hurtful stuff to people. Stuff which we generally label as 'sadistic'. Whether what actually motivates the Psychopath to do this stuff is sadism or something else is what I'm unsure about.

What motivates the excruciating forms of sadism is probably the feeling of glee it produces. The glee radiates from a feeling of TOTAL control, even if only momentary. These are people who get emotional payback from predation, deception. I imagine a feeling akin to joy that we experience witnessing a beautiful sunset, they feel watching someone squirm in agony. It may be inappropriate to frame this in spiritual terms, but it is darned tempting, isn't it?

#13671 - 08/05/12 08:45 PM Re: What motivates the psychopath ? [Re: Lisa Rosenbaum]
NotCrzy Offline

Registered: 02/13/12
Posts: 61
Originally Posted By: Lisa Rosenbaum

Nature/nurture go hand in hand when it comes to the alien predator. One has to wonder how a mother responds when she has to deal with a baby psychopath. They are probably hard to bond with...aloof and weird.

The Psychopath consistently tells me his inability to "be normal" relates to the distance and lack of love from his mother. It is an interesting thought, we are all very influenced by the way our parents interact with us. Sometimes I think that he has developed a lack of caring and inability to love from the distance of his mother. On the other hand, if he was hardwired from birth as a Psychopath, I can imagine that he himself forced his mother to be distant. I can also imagine a scenario where his mother was in fact a normal mother, and everything he says about her is bs and designed for my sympathy. When he is very angry at me he tells me I am just like his mother.

#13766 - 08/29/12 12:37 AM Re: What motivates the psychopath ? [Re: NotCrzy]
LaylaGirl Offline

Registered: 08/28/12
Posts: 5
Someone had mentioned what are they like as infants? I only know what my ex's mom said about him. She said "He was always pushing me away even as an infant and he cried all the time"

She had her own mental issues too so I have no idea the role she played in all of it.

As far as the sadistic stuff. One thing my ex used to do to me was tickle me, tickle me to the point of sobbing and tears, it was NOT fun, it was overkill, it was a common occurence, he used to say "Guess what time it is!!!!" and I remember begging NO please dont, NO as he came after me. He would pin me down and tickle me beyond it being fun. I would start to get hysterical and start to cry, to the point where I couldnt take a breath in barely. Sometimes Id feel like a crazed animal trying to get him off me and try to hit him. Like fight or flight kicked in as I couldnt stand what he was doing. When I reached that point he was abruptly drop me, this was often done on the bed, and he would stand up, look at me disgusted and say "Your no fun" and walk out of the room. Id lay there sweaty, catching my breath, tears down my face and confused.

He also used to come in and say stuff like "So and so died" and Id look and feel sad right away and say Omgosh what happened? My mind started to go down that path of sorrow and hed say "JUST KIDDING!"

If there was a pool or water anywhere near us, it meant "Throw her in" I watched him do this to his grandfathers elderly girlfriend at a family party and I was mortified. She was a senior and he thought he was so funny.

When he was a youth pastor he used to walk around church to the youth group girls and yank there ponytails or hair clips out of there hair as he walked by, high school girls, I know how important my hair was and looking nice at that age and Id be walking next to him and seeing the girls faces and upset would get to me, I could only apologize.

One sunday he took the baby Jesus doll out of the nativity and walked around the church like he was carrying a real infant and then faked that he tripped throwing the baby, several women went and ran for it mortified. I was not in the room when this happened, but later a mother came up with her daughter, who was young, and said her daughter was so upset by what happened (She thought it was a real baby and didnt get it was a joke) He did this type of stuff often, yes guy laughed, some people found it funny, but it always had a cruel impact on someone, it wasnt silly haha, it caused people emotional distress.

He began to do the tickling to our kids near the end and I got very angry and walked in the room and demanded he stop when our son was asking him to stop(he was 6) He looked so mean and cold and said "Dont you tell me what to do" I said "IM his MOM, he asked for you to STOP" my momma bear instinct and no fear kicked in, I was triggered by what he did to me. I split with him shortly after that, but I know he did a lot of fear things with them, they hated off road driving(as did I, I was flung to the floorboard as he did donuts on a dark road one night, begging him to stop as he laughed. He did this stuff to the kids after we split, and also scared them on jet skis, I wasnt there but he called me saying our kids had no sense of humor and kept telling him to slow down or stop.

Edited by LaylaGirl (08/29/12 12:39 AM)
In a relationship and marriage with a psyhopath for about 15 yrs. Out since 2001, have raised two kids with him and the harrassment via the courts and custody and co parenting issues.

#13767 - 08/29/12 07:41 AM Re: What motivates the psychopath ? [Re: LaylaGirl]
Smokey Offline

Registered: 03/21/12
Posts: 78
Mine used to do that "did you hear so and so died?" thing to various people. He would come up with a big detailed and so convincing story about how and, when he had got everyone upset, he might say "Just joking".

Other times he let people leave still thinking their friend/relative had died. He didn't do it to people when I was around as he knew I would not have played along.

He tried tickling me a couple of times but my dog nipped him as he (the dog) thought I was being hurt. When I was around he was friendly to my dog. I later learned from friends that once I left the room he would shove the dog away from him.

He would also "play" by hitting me with a pillow but he did it so hard it hurt.It's a bit like a spiteful child, trying to sneakily hurt someone, and then deny that was what they did(and was what they meant to do).

Edited by Smokey (08/29/12 07:44 AM)

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