Hi MoreCautiousNow,

Yes the sadism thing I'm not sure about. Psychopaths certainly do horrible hurtful stuff to people. Stuff which we generally label as 'sadistic'. Whether what actually motivates the Psychopath to do this stuff is sadism or something else is what I'm unsure about.

In reply to: Another issue I have contemplated is this "energy-draining" phenomena that psychopath's seem to have on their "victims". (This draining effect is not merely one of "exasperation" or tediousness of dealing with a psychopath, it's more like the engery is "stolen" somehow. Thats a tricky one, and the answer is - I don't know. I do know that having a relationship with a Psychopath can be a huge strain emotionally and physically. Nervous and physical disorders can result, e.g opportunistic infections as a result of depressed immune response. Personally I'd be wary of pushing the 'emotional vampire' metaphor too far for fear of falling into pseudoscience or metaphysics.

In reply to:I am beginning to wonder if Psychopath's "agitate" certain situations or cause situations just to evoke higher energy levels or more energy that the psychopath can somehow "feed" from. Psychopaths certainly do not like the calm, the mundane, the routine... their natural tendency is to stir things up to alleviate boredom. In the absence of the normal emotional satisfaction which we might expeience in any number of normal situations - for instance the satisfying sense of 'a job well done' which we might experience from the completion of even a routine task - a psychopath will try to maximise sensory stimulation. And that could be anything from a bungee jump to making you angry, and then enjoying the show and the thought that he had caused you to be angry - was controlling your behaviour.

lets see if Diannes software censors this. Bet it will.:-)

A good company name for all Ps would be "[censored] Stirrers'R'Us"
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>ha...thought so. Diannes software doesnt like the word [censored]. ;-)

Hi JustAMan

LOL LOL LOL. Too funny. But I liked the "company name". I also had a visual for the logo, but we won't go there.

I understand what you are saying in reference to the pseudoscience/metaphysical, but I am still curious and sincerely believe there is something to it. Until reading that others had the same experience, I thought it was just me. I am really curious about it, but perhaps this is not the proper venue to discuss it.

However your answer does put some of it into a better perspective and I believe correctly.

Thanks for reply and the big chuckle -- made my day!!

Regards,
MCN

I am curious about all this. My Psychopath says he hates arguing and that he can't handle it anymore. He always told me that he would want to see me more often if we didn't argue so much because he can't handle it. He said he wants peace and quiet. Also, he loves to be alone. He lives alone and doesn't open his curtains at all not even in the daytime. It is always dark in there. He keeps all doors shut and locked. My therapist says he is burning out. Has anyone he experienced the "burn out" phase with a psychopath?

Why does he says things to start an argument or be hurtful when he says he can't take the stress of an argument? Also, I want to reflect on the "mother" issue. He goes there every Sunday for dinner. He phones her nearly every day from either work or home and complains how he "can't make it". How they give him to much work or he is sick or they treat him badly at work which they don't. Anything he can cry about he does to her. She is 84 years old and treats him like a baby. Always sides with him and always sends food home with him on Sunday. But every Friday we get the garbage ready and we end up throwing out the food she sends because he is to lazy to heat it up and it goes bad. He rarely gets groceries or baths. Justs lays on the couch most of the time. And cries to Mummy. Do you think this is the sign of burnout? Does this mean that he knows he doesn't have the energy to get someone else and needs to keep me?

Annette

In reply to:

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I thought it was just me. I am really curious about it, but perhaps this is not the proper venue to discuss it.

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I dont see why not. What do you see as a possible objection to discussing this? As this 'draining' or 'emotional vampirism' experience has been widely reported in relation to psychopathy it seems like a perfectly valid topic to me. As an atheist materialist I'm just averse to any interpretation that inclines towards psychism.

In reply to:

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Also, he loves to be alone. He lives alone and doesn't open his curtains at all not even in the daytime. It is always dark in there. He keeps all doors shut and locked.

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So hes what you might call an antisocial antisocial then. Sounds like he needs to see a therapist.

Ive heard of Psychopath burnout but I dont know anything about it. The Psychopath I have knowledge of is currently behaving like the energiser bunny on crack. No sign of burn out there, more's the pity.

Ha ha, censoring some words helps our vivid imaginations (it is one of the few things I seem to know how to do! I also wish this software had a spell checker but with my lack of techno knowledge I get sweaty palms when I think of all the work etc. it took to get this version up and running (my guess is the newer version has it)

Hi JustAMan

I have no problems with your beliefs or anyone else’s, however I don’t want to delve into a topic that will offend or cause contentions which is why I backed off of discussing it here.

Personally, I am skeptical of psychic stuff and religion (any religion), however I try to maintain an open mind.

I do believe there is “something” to this energy drain experience and maybe this is too far advanced for “our” current technology to explain or fathom. I’m no rocket scientist and have no answers for it either, but I believe it (the energy drain) exists. I think it is pertinent to anyone who has experienced it and difficult for others, who have not experienced it, to grasp. So my conclusion is that there is some way this is happening, but “how” I do not know.

Anyone else who wishes to comment or add to this I will listen to as I find it curious phenomena.

The rest of your reply is not in reference to my post, so I will refrain from comment.

Regards,
MCN

Attention-something was really askew with child/mother bond in early years.
Big Baby in a adult body.
Energy zapper-goes after your core spirit.

feddup49
(member)
08/26/05 08:32 PM

Motivations of Psychopath

The negative attention of a Psychopath is overwhelming.
They truly are like bratty children abusing "adult" privledges.
The sucking the life- blood out-energy is so real-Its as if they go after your spirit-which is debilitating.

**moved to combine thread, thanks, Di

Although the distinction between antisocial personality and Psychopathy is often blurred (merged, really, in the DSM), the following observation is interesting and one I have not come across elsewhere:



Regardless of the predominantly aggressive or passive character of the antisocial personality, what is remarkable is that their gratification is linked to bodily functions, to eating, drinking, drugs and alcohol, and sexuality is divested of its object relations implications, divested of love and tenderness. – Clarkin, JF, Yeomans, F., & Kernberg, OF (1999), Psychotherapy for Borderline Personality.

In reply to:

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Regardless of the predominantly aggressive or passive character of the antisocial personality, what is remarkable is that their gratification is linked to bodily functions, to eating, drinking, drugs and alcohol, and sexuality is divested of its object relations implications, divested of love and tenderness.

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I think I'd generalise their statement slightly:

"... what is remarkable is that their gratification is linked to the senses, to eating, drinking, drugs and alcohol, fast driving, dangerous sports, risky activity in general... anything that feels different, is 'on the edge' ..has got the buzz. And sexuality is divested of its object relations implications, divested of love and tenderness, of all emotional content.

So... As Ive generalised the original proposition, it ends up looking like a restatement of "High sensory input activity" in my first post in this thread.

Psychopaths inhabit the realm of the senses. As they experience no emotional satisfactions of the normal type - for example the feelings of a 'job well done', the natural emotional bond of fatherhood or motherhood - the pursuit of sensory gratification tends to be extreme to fill the emotional void... they seem desperate to feel...something. Always jumping from one thing to the next to stave off the boredom - which as everything is ultimately unsatisfactory (repeated sensory stimulation with no emotional gratification rapidly palls) , seems to be the Ps main problem in life.

this is item 3 on Hares PCL-R checklist:

3. NEED FOR STIMULATION or PRONENESS TO BOREDOM -- an excessive need for novel, thrilling, and exciting stimulation; taking chances and doing things that are risky. Psychopaths often have a low self-discipline in carrying tasks through to completion because they get bored easily. They fail to work at the same job for any length of time, for example, or to finish tasks that they consider dull or routine.


Antisocial Personality, Sociopathy, and Psychopathy