The P I knew did not do physical harm. His torture was emotional and psychological. I can't diagnose your son but if you are in emotional pain then you deserve to find help for yourself no matter what he is. Keep coming back here, reading and sharing. You will find the answers along the way. betterway

SJS,

It is well documented and this also happens to be the case with the P in my life. He was not physically violent to people or animals.....unless provoked. In fact he seemed to enjoy (?) the company of animals....but showed absolutely no emotion when his dog was stolen....and again no emotion when the dog was found several days later.
So, to answer your question, this does not rule your P out as a P. There are many "white collar" P's out there.
Rick

Whether or not you decide to continue contact, you should give a great deal of thought about continuing to help the person financially, specially if it's a hardship for you.

I am quite sure you are a good parent, and that his condition is not a product of upbringing. Severe disorders I truly believe are genetic. Just think about it, what could you possibly have done to make him unfeeling?

Algaringo

Hi All, Being new and totally relieved to know that there are other parents with similar problems to mine. My step daughter was diagnosed as being psychopathic at the age of 6 years which is extremely young for such a diagnosis. At first we thought it was all just a normal reaction to the changes in her life. New step mom, sister and brother, but we soon realised that it went much further than that. Besides the constant lying, stealing and agressiveness, both physically (towards the other children especially) and verbally, the most difficult aspect was the rejection and critisism we got from our family and friends. When amoungst strangers or "outsiders" she turns into the most well behaved, well mannered child any parent could wish to have. No one wanted to beleive anything we told them.
It is now 9 years further on and she is 15 and very quickly becoming worse. She seems to have one goal in mind and that is to break up the family we have tried to create. (and she is succeeding)
How are we supposed to continue? Any advice?

Hi Jenny

I'm glad you've found the forum and I hope you find it helpful. I think being the parent of a psychopath must be the very worst of all situations. Although my situation was different - my ex was a P - I think there are a few things that apply to all situations. They seem to know just what buttons to press to bring out the worst possible behaviour in all those around them, and somehow come out smelling of roses themselves - as you say, outsiders can't believe the things you tell them about her because she is so nice when they are around. The only advice I can give is to keep your belief in yourself and in the other members of your family. Watch out for the 'divide and rule' tactic where the P sets one person against another by provoking bad behaviour on the part of those around them. Keep your belief in yourself and in your husband and the other children - you are not a bad parent, and what is happening is NOT your fault.

I've heard that Dr Hare is experimenting with a treatment plan which, although it will not cure the P, will, they hope, give them goals that will to some extent modify their behaviour. I wonder if its worth finding out about this?

All the very best and I'm sorry I can't be of more help.

Ali,

Very well put. Bravo!

Rick