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#13750 - 08/27/12 05:12 AM Re: Sex and the Psychopath [Re: Anonymous]
Whitefeather Offline
member

Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 39
I am still getting over sexual abuse from psycho I was so in love with the psycho and didn't have much experience in today's sex attitudes in love I truly believed he was in love too I had no idea he was involved with so many women until I ended up in hospital from sickness and miscarriage. The psycho ran my name so low amongst his community the side effects I'm still having problems with.

Psychos fantasy was based on younger women in fact virgins to be exact so young he stalked them and many others I didn't know until the very end that he was seeing or creating such problems I feel terrible now not realising these women or girls were victims I remember one night psycho broke down and said he wanted to die he had done terrible things I helped him stayed with him but I never really got it I just didn't understand what he was really doing psycho now in my last ever stupid contact believing in love I honestly have not been with another person since I met psycho I was and still stupidly am in love with however they are very clever at making the love nest look so good and right for you your the one all along were his words I know and psycho knows there was love in us but the horrific truth he knew what he was doing took total advantage and just gratified his sexual needs at a persons expense.

My first year with psycho was ok gentle loving the next two aggressive abusive and I learnt to switch off during this time he frightened me the end of us I ended in hospital my recent time just over a month now the first sexual encounter was I thought he loved me the last time he threatened and didn't care what state I was in at first he pretended I guess then ended with abusive name calling and hurt me then he stated in a completely different person attitude that he was a murderer and he would rape me if I didn't give him what he wanted well he won and got away with it no one believes me as he hides behind a church face I'm sorry if it offends anyone but I am a believer but I never in my life would think that this person who brang me to faith would indeed be such a enemy all I can say is what I'm reading here has happened to me as well I'm done with it and now face a huge move it's going to be hard but it's the only way psycho has taken everything from me trust faith socialising life and it's affected my work health children friends I'm in awe of all the posts the courage you have has given me strength to go and never turn back it's what I have to do to get free and hold my life together god bless and protect everyone here I'm still learning what I have dealt with

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#13761 - 08/28/12 05:45 PM Re: Sex and the Psychopath [Re: Whitefeather]
LaylaGirl Offline
member

Registered: 08/28/12
Posts: 5
Just found this site, and saw this thread was at the top. I have been out from my psychopath for about 12 yrs now. And its amazing what a number they can do on you.

I was with mine at a young age and he was my first real relationship and sexual partner. I was 16. He was 18. I now can look back over it, after much therapy, reading, etc.

My situation I was groomed if you will like a sexual predator does. I was violated and just laid there, I cried. I told him that night when he went home that what he did was wrong, he agreed, said he was sorry and it wouldnt happen again. I believed him(I was a church girl and he was going to church with me and thought if he apologized he was truly sorry) Naive I know.

But from there it became trips out to the middle of nowhere, in the desert, dirt roads, they were set up as "romantic" dates, but the end goal was more sexual behavior.

I felt since he taken my body I had to stay with him, and I had a lot of guilt, I spent alot of times in tears and crying and praying to God after any sexual activity.

Hed sit there with me and agree and rub my head? But it wouldnt stop.

Its a long story, but I ended up marrying him feeling its what I was supposed to do. I hated sex, I was tense, I laid there, just wanting it to be over, didnt feel he cared about, felt something was wrong with me and that I was being punished by God for the premarital behavior.

He would tickle me and pin me down to the point I couldnt stand it, its a very confusing thing to happen, being tickled to the point of hysterical crying and begging and pleading. He would abruptly stop, sometimes I started to hit and freak out. He would drop me and say "Your no fun" and walk away? he used to make tickle hands at me and says "ITS THAT TIME AGAIN!!!" and Id be begging him no no please dont.

Sex was constantly something he wanted, touching, grabbing, trying to arouse me, he would use objects, I was often sore, he would bite me hard.

I wont get too graphic,, but this was all I knew, and I just thought this is how it was, he said "I cant help myself you turn me on so much"

Sex became more and more kinky, limits pushes, he would beg me to come in the bathroom to watch me and touch me during... it was heading to talk of swinger parties...

I got out right around that point. I sought counseling, I felt I had no way out, I felt trapped and felt Id have to find another "Man" to rescue me, and counseling helped me muddle through all that, and from there I got into domestic violence therapy and a support group.


I was trusting, honest, and naive, and young when we got together and a church girl.

What was going on with him? SOme he confessed, some I later found out after the fact, etc

He had sex with a man for $$ while we dated
He had a gay man show up at his place wanting to "talk"
Another gay man show up on his job site making sexual inneuendo talk

He had a woman online he was trying to meet at his job site while he stayed in a hotel, he was sending mail to her and having hers come to his job, he had even sent a gift to her son, and she was writing letters saying "She wanted to love him and his kids" He had another one claim pregnancy and at that point we were separated and I made him confirm when we once tried to get back together, I made him get tested for stds to have sex with me again.

He had women in various states and got on websites for quickies in hotels, like 45 min, he got a woman with some guys from a job they bet on who could "Bed" her.

I could not wear a low cut or vneck shirt, it meant I wanted sex and he would be all over me.

But after we split he claimed I had multiple partners, had sex in front of our kids and that I had a porn problem?

He put notes in a sex toy in our house before he left for me.

He was very compulsive and I cannot even imagine what else went on....

I lived with this, it became "Normal" to me, I went through a lot of stages dealing with all this and I know its difficult to hear and can be triggering. But its real. If we dont talk to one another, and speak up, we cant help others and make them aware. I didnt even know what happened was wrong!? A guy friend I once opened up to said "Layla! Thats not normal" and it was like the light bulb went on when someone spoke to me like that.

Its part of my old life now, so far from ME that I am today, I cannot even imagine what his new girlfriends are like today or what they deal with. Wouldnt matter if I could walk away from him totally, but I have kids with him and my kids are in those homes, heaven knows what they have been exposed to
_________________________
In a relationship and marriage with a psyhopath for about 15 yrs. Out since 2001, have raised two kids with him and the harrassment via the courts and custody and co parenting issues.

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#13771 - 08/29/12 09:58 AM Re: Sex and the Psychopath [Re: LaylaGirl]
Whitefeather Offline
member

Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 39
Yeah church man mask I can't even begin to recall the four years of hell thanks for your post and honesty I sort of know what's going to happen to him in gods eyes or at least in what they and him preached I sure am frightened my last words to him were when god calls us up I will get on my knees and say confess how much sin I'm in because I loved you and ask god to punish me alongside you so you can watch me suffer to the end I felt really ashamed of myself for allowing me to fall into his dirty trapagain I so wanted to believe him I did god their good mate I've never seen anything like this and I've worked in court alongside the biggest liars in the universe I don't know how to climb out of the pit I'm in I have to leave it's such a long way away from anything and I can't afford it but I can't watch him marry his next one and no one believes me they all think I'm a crazy Delilah I hate these people I shouldn't I know are they all sex offenders am I dumb blind stupid I know what's happened seems so unbelievable but it's true it happened

I can't believe that people allow psychopaths to get away where I am if you say this and don't produce the evidence you are up for slander but I understand his evil motives and brainalfunction but what about these people who once called me their friend who always was there for them always never did I turn my back so cruelly he has even turned his family parents I've adored as my own against me now I cut the contact because I can't bear talk of him I have made a very strong decision which they all really have contributed to I'm going that far away leaving my home town my sister who's married to his family gaaaaaaah!!!!!!! I know now why they stay away or do I?????????

Aaaaaah my head is going crazy sometimes but I never thought they would curse me out but I'm glad in one way so I know I will never look at his evilness he has snubbed me from my hometown it's teaming with evilness I've told my immediate family to get out and I'm taking my son god have no mercy on them it is truly evil what some of them have plotted truly evil I can't stand it anymore I don't want the evilness over my son he's gone through enough when does it stop when I make it stop and go because I thought I was being a bit revengeful in emotions but I know I'm right inside my heart this church and him is a brilliant mastermind cover all the goodness that comes out then they curse, call you names, try and put the fear in you by using god sexually violate women, use up and defile people who loved them, abuse, rape, cause mental illness victims to self harm and take drugs till they overdose, put you out of work, vial creatures where did this come from??????

What planet are we on????? What happened to us was their a invasion and I missed the news or something???? I've read of fallen angels walking with us is this them?????? Or scientifically have we mutated to such vial human beings where the brain can't register remorse emotions etc as the studies show???? Who gets away with violence, drug abuse, under age sex, having sex with your exs mum yuk yuk yuk, six different church girls , belting kids and women, and then there was me the partridge in the pear tree f!$k what a scam what a precedent they would have you know it wouldn't stand up in court because the church have their own laws and more money than this county has to help our real people in sickness sometimes I feel like i've lost my mind I can't live in the same place and be reminded wherever I go he is there I can't go to church again because he told them it's me I can't go into a shop or cafe because his family is in it I've now been accused of indifference of cultural understanding and that may be so in blood but it's far from the truth how can they live with themselves the kids well youth on the street the ones who are on trouble know the truth of this psychopath walking he showed them how to use bastard has ruined so many lives it's incredible it's like a infection mutated amongst a blood line of very strange people what is going on ????

Well I reckon I'm glad I didn't pursuit a career of lying because I would be guilty of letting them go for $$a hour. Does this stop is it my heart fooling itself in broken state, is this my head saying yep it's true you wasted four long hard bloody cruel demeaning pathetic try again sex abused years with the opitimy of moralistic decadence!!!! God save us!!!!! I have to go away because his presence in a shop kills my soul is this again what they want behind this bloody mask of I love you your the one you will fly with the angels! If he does have brain that is malfunctioned a heart that doesn't bleed like were supposed to do they have a soul?

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#13772 - 08/29/12 10:38 AM Re: Sex and the Psychopath [Re: Whitefeather]
LaylaGirl Offline
member

Registered: 08/28/12
Posts: 5
Whitefeather,
Sounds like you have a lot your dealing with, its not uncommon to be in such turmoil and confusion after leaving one of these types.

I did lose my church and my "community" as my counselor put it when I filed for divorce against him. We spent 12 yrs in a church together and that was our lives. I LEFT. Nobody understood what was going on because I didnt talk and was told seeking worldly counsel was a sin. My ex went in turn to our church friends and told them I was cheating and having an affair and pretty much played a victim and this poor man to all of them. I was just trying to find a way "Out" and for someone to help me.

My ex's family is very large and extended, I liked them all, I used to speak to his mom all the time, she works as a peer counselor for domestic violence?! When I left she changed on me, like if I wasnt "Sick" and calling her upset over what was happening at home, which she was VERY aware of, she didnt know what to do or say to me, and she began inflicting emotional games on me to try and knock me back into that state, as a result I had to cut her off.

His family used to tell me I was good for him and how he was going down a bad path before he was with me. I thankfully clung onto 2 relatives that lived in town, his grandfather and his aunt who have never turned on me, they knew me personally. His grandfather would say "He did a really stupid thing losing you"

I just moved a few mos ago to somewhere far from my old town, I was afraid of running into mine. But he did follow me back when I first left him, I would get triggered by seeing trucks like his around town, would send me into a panic.

As far as the reason why, do they have a soul, is it in the brain, is it spiritual, I think its probably all of the above. The problem is we want to make sense of it, understand why, and we just cannot even begin to relate or wrap our minds around them and their ways, its what makes us NOT like them, thank heavens!


Edited by LaylaGirl (08/29/12 10:40 AM)
_________________________
In a relationship and marriage with a psyhopath for about 15 yrs. Out since 2001, have raised two kids with him and the harrassment via the courts and custody and co parenting issues.

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#13793 - 09/05/12 04:48 PM Re: Sex and the Psychopath [Re: Survivor]
Brokenintopieces Offline
member

Registered: 09/04/12
Posts: 6





Hello, I found this site by looking for a way to have closure within my self ! I can not believe that when I found this site I read all night long about my own experience of a man whom I met one year ago, that has lefted me angry,sad,depressed and worthless.

My story starts like this~~

I am 47 years old and a single parent of two grown children whom have lived on there own. I was in a long relation ship with a man who was good to me but we just decided to go seperate ways. I moved into my own Apartment and was having a great single life but there was something that was missing. I was tired of going out on dates and so tired of these men who play games. I decided to write a book! Yes I wanted to write a book about men and their point of view of a woman, vice versa same as women.

I went to social clubs,gatherings,pool clubs. I met so many people of diffrent ages. I started my journey alone and I wanted more truth about this world of people for I am so blinded by what is out here in this world. So many marraiges of curruption, so many broken hearts, ect.

I was so clueless of it all. I then heard my girl friends tell me to go onto a dating site for which I did. I created me a profile and I posted my pictures. It was over all so annoying because it was as if the men was hunters on their prey!

I went out with a dozen of men only to realise that they was nothing as their profile spoke of. I weeded through so many. All the storys of what someone done to them. All the hate towards the ex or the women in general. On the dating site I was on it will allow you to scroll through the pictures of men and there is thre blocks to check, yes,no,mabe. As I was scrolling one by one this one man I saw for a glimpse. I then for some reason said oh! he is so goodlooking ! I clicked "yes" to him. Then it was not no time he replied to me on a message in my in box. It said "Hi there" ! my name is ------You are a good looking lady. I then replied back to him of thank you! I knew that all men say this and I knew that it was something they all say to all women. I had allready been knowledgeable of men and their games before so I was not new to this. He then was on line at the time, he asked me he would like to chat and if I would like his number to call. I took his number and I called him. His voice was goofy at first and he was like to me up front. He metioned to me that he was looking for a renter in his house woud I be enterested? I said no. He talked about what he did for a living verses I did also about me. He also said that there was not nothing wrong with friends and frenge benifits. I did reply that it was not for me.

So, we kind of left things as being just friends that would text and share our dates one on one about what this guy was like and he also would tell me about the women he went out with as well. He told me about a lot of them. Things he did not like mostly. This was in May of 2011 when we started talking. We did not ask one another to meet until like months down the road. He would start to know me more. I would call him up asking him would he like to go out some where to get a drink or so. Every time I did he would have a exuse that he was at his guy friends drinking he could not drive. He turned me down so many times, the reason why was because he was shuffling women back and fourth. I did not know that then.

Well one day it happend! I was washing my car and he called me. It was September 10th 2011 at 11:00 am. He asked me if I would like to meet him at Hams. This is a local small restraunt which is in his town not but probably 20 minitues away from me.

I hung up the phone I looked so horrible I was like this mad woman wanting to make sure I looked good, for he was so handsome.
I rinsed my car off then went to a family dollar store to get some make up,safty pens and a hair doodle to put my hair up. I had some clothes in my trunck for the good will so I grabbed a cute shirt and shorts. I rushed to hams. I then saw him pull in with a Red Z71 Chevrolet, he had his un glasses on and omg! he was even so more handsome then in his pictures. He then had opened his truck door and was out. He was so tall. He had the most beautiful teeth and smile,eyes green,his hair was perfect. I was about to pass out for I never thought I would have any one look at me as good looking as he was.

I and him went inside Hamms, he of course opened the door for me. I think all men do this at first to impres you. I and him sat down across one another. At the time I did not notice him trying to order the cheapest meal on the menu. I also told him that I can pay for my own sinse I felt we was friends from the begining. It did not feel like a date any way . I and him finished and I asked him did he or has he met any one whom he may consider to see, he looked at me and said "yes, I think I have."

He said he had to finish his yard work of mowing and smiled and said sure could use some help, would I want to come over ? I said sure. I went over to his house not far from Hams. We went inside and he asked if I wanted something to drink. I did not. He sat down in his living room on the the small sofa. He had nice furniture but I noticed he did not have much of any thing else.

I sat down next to him and he all of a sudden pulled me over to him and kissed me.Not a soft kiss.This was a kiss as if he was mad.
I did not like the way he kissed me. Then he did start to touch my breast and he was making me so into him that I did let in. I let him take me to his bed and he was so like I have never in my life had in any man. It was hot! He hooked me...

We talked about all his past girl friends. He told me about his first one whom he has a daughter by which is 19 now. He said of course all bad about her. He said she cheated and was lazy became fat and that she was a pig ate all the food up. He said so much about her that I was like wow! how awful. He spoke of his one wife he married. Only first and no more. He talked negative about her. He bragged about how he was sodid this and that, worked hard. After that was others. More and more. Then there was one he had for 7 years. They got into fights, hurting fights. How he broke her ribbs where she got into his face and hit him first. It was always a woman who abused him for his actions. I believed him. I was like so into him of why would women mis treat him, why they would not clean or cook. He had this older woman who lived there from he put a ad in the paper for a renter months before I moved in. This woman was not all that attracted. He would move strangers in for he said he needed help with his house payment. He had only made 14.00 a hour. He had a child whom was 12 years old from where he had got this woman pregnate and he later after 9 months found out she had his baby. He said she set him up. I believed him.

So all of a sudden he is coming to my place and he was having me over his, he wanted me to move in because of the renter was going to have to go! He wanted her out. Yea I asked him if he and she had something going on of course no they did not.

But I do remember him telling me she would hit on him. I moved in October 1,2011. The renter moved out two days before. He asked me could I handle paying 350.00 a month. For that he did need all the help he could and it would help me as well. I moved in and I cleaned the house to spotless. He had no food he had no toilet paper, no hair shampoo. A pice of soap. He said that he learned to do things very conservative, that he need not waste money. His clothes was out dated. He had no up to date on anything. He told me things of his surviving with eating boloni sandwhiches and he made it on that. I gave him 350.00 I went and spent like over 600.00 on things for the house. Food ,laundry stuff and shampoo,ect...cleaning supplies.

I was happy. He was so sweet to me. He told me that he did not want me to turn him down on sex that he was a man who needed it everyday. I noticed so much of his ways. He was organized he was very structured. He took a shower at 6 pm he got off work at 3:30 he was off on Fridays and Saturdays. He was also very jealous! He text me all day long stupid text of "Am I smoking with my boys at work" ? He had turned into a diffrent person after three weeks. I began to drink with him, he drank every night. He smoked weed. He smoked ciggerettes but he only did when he drank. He ate at 9:30 pm I could not rest I had to cook and clean and if I did anything for me he would tell me I needed to keep him occupied. He kept on telling me he knew all about my past of being a bar fly. He had his sources. He told me that I was not going to be on the internet nor could I have my 5500 friends . He would call me if I was 5 min late coming home. I cought hell for working on a Saturday. He said I was a person who ran. He kept on and on riding me hard . He said I know you are not happy. He would put me down and if I spoke to him as Why are you doing this to me, he would laugh and mock at me. He would tell me I have no respect. He would take my panties and make me get rid of the thongs said that if I ever wore them he would choke me with them. I was not allowed to wear any thing with showing my cleavage. He would check what I wore each day. He would grab my phone to make sure I was not talking to a man. He watched me constantly. On my face book. He never had our pictures together on face book. He also called me stupid, I was achurch whore. I in November I flipped on him. I drank so much wine I left in my car and I was lucky I did not wreck get a DWI. I signed my self into a hospital for my nerves was torn up.

I was hospitalised for one week, my family said I went into a break down and was telling them all about what he was doingto me. I told them I lied that he really did not do that to me. I did it so I could go back to him. I was so much in love with him I GAVE UP MY LIFE AND MY FAMILY,FRIENDS! I continued to be treated like a dog. Sex became very much as he only wanted what he wanted to him self. He wanted me to give him oral. He stopped kissing me, he stopped telling me he loved me. He omg! he hit me caused me to have a ceisure. I LIED TO THE HOSPITAL. He one day was sweet the next mean. I had to pay more money to him 500.00 a month. I bought it all, he would drive my car for it had gas in it. His never did. He never brought no food or anything in the house,he only bought his booze or weed. He begain to use me for trips. He used me for you name it. He made me pay 800.00 for a water problem said it was my stupid fault. He liked brown headed women.I colored my hair. I lost weight. He one day would say I think I AM ALL THAT THEN SAY i WAS NOT.

I was told he loved me how everything looks good in the house that I made the home. He was a one day this or that. At night he would kick me if I snored. He had two diffrent like voices. One was a gay voice then one was a man voice. He omg he was wanting me to die. He said to my mom I was accident prone. He had me so convinced that I gave him 70.0000 on my life policy. He never wanted any one to come over. My family kids, no one not even his. One person he confided in was his Ex of seven years. He told her bad things about me. He told me bad things of her. He omg even spent the night with her. He and her was together texting about me towards the end. He vitumised me. He made me want to kill my self. He hit me slapped me for no reason. He dragged me on the ground. He did it. I LOVED HIM STILL. I woulld tell him please can we start over. Omg! He looked at him self in the mirror al lthe time, he brushed his teeth three times a day for one hour, I am not kidding you all! He told me about his getting by with things like he was charged with assult for women and he had got out of it because he is so smart he knows the system. He told me he shot a man.

He also told me that he would try to torch his wife by the gas on the grill. He told me about how he did things. He also assulted my son and had me as a witness . He said or convenced me that my son hit him first. No he did, I lied for him. I WENT WITH OUT SPEAKING TO MY SON FOR 5 MONTHS. !! I would not call my grandmother. One day I WOULD CALL MY FRIENDS FOR HELP! then tell them I am okay! I cried wolf. I was begining to be as him. I was being into this started to go into his computer, omg! that is when things started to become worst. I saw porno sites he was on. I saw where he had women on his emails. I also started noticing more and more each day changing patterns. He became distance from me. Telling me that I am sick need to sign my self back into the hospital. Isaw a text where he told a female, looking good! I called her. She told me the truth. I confronted him he said that was the wrong number. He lied and lied. He would never tell me to leave, he would make me live in hell. He also was wanting sex the way he wanted it. He made me so angry and sick. I cried and cried so many times in my car in another room at work. I was a complete mess for so long .

I began to not want to come home I was afraid of what mood he was in. I asked him for 20.00 for gas he said he was not my bank. He was so cold and never said he was sorry for anything. He made me think I was the one who said something when it was him. He also made me think I was the one who started a fight, it was him. He I knew was up to something and I then started to out smart him. I went on a dating site and I disguised my self as abeautiful woman. OMG he hit on me. I also found out his pass words . He had been on the dating site foe months of me still with him. I was sick and puked for what he had said to these women. He did them just as me. He is on there today doing the same. He is in desperate need of a woman. He wants another victum as me! I am so stupid ashamed of my self for not listening to others. I am stupid to not believe his own daughter. I have been a victum of abuse, violence. It has been only three weeks now on my own! I packed my stuff left him with most of it. I got me a apartment in one day I bought me new everything. Thank God for my job and my bosses who gave me the use of a truck and 1,000 dollars. I love it. I am mad and very angry for he is never going to be stopped. Those poor women on the dating site are feeding into his trap. I thought about making a fake profile to let them know about him. Lat weekend he text me only to say "DO I KNOW WHO MY ENEMIES WAS ? That is odd to say....

I hate him I wish I never met him. I can not focus on nothing but wanting him to pay for what he did to me. I am scared for I do not want another man in my life. I feel ugly, I think I am. I have no self esteem. I am at the end and I going to start my book and the one chapter will be my own experience of a man of sickness and evil ......

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#13794 - 09/05/12 04:54 PM Re: Sex and the Psychopath [Re: Brokenintopieces]
Brokenintopieces Offline
member

Registered: 09/04/12
Posts: 6

My one year life with hell!

Hello, I found this site by looking for a way to have closure within my self ! I can not believe that when I found this site I read all night long about my own experience of a man whom I met one year ago, that has lefted me angry,sad,depressed and worthless.

My story starts like this~~

I am 47 years old and a single parent of two grown children whom have lived on there own. I was in a long relation ship with a man who was good to me but we just decided to go seperate ways. I moved into my own Apartment and was having a great single life but there was something that was missing. I was tired of going out on dates and so tired of these men who play games. I decided to write a book! Yes I wanted to write a book about men and their point of view of a woman, vice versa same as women.

I went to social clubs,gatherings,pool clubs. I met so many people of diffrent ages. I started my journey alone and I wanted more truth about this world of people for I am so blinded by what is out here in this world. So many marraiges of curruption, so many broken hearts, ect.

I was so clueless of it all. I then heard my girl friends tell me to go onto a dating site for which I did. I created me a profile and I posted my pictures. It was over all so annoying because it was as if the men was hunters on their prey!

I went out with a dozen of men only to realise that they was nothing as their profile spoke of. I weeded through so many. All the storys of what someone done to them. All the hate towards the ex or the women in general. On the dating site I was on it will allow you to scroll through the pictures of men and there is thre blocks to check, yes,no,mabe. As I was scrolling one by one this one man I saw for a glimpse.

I then for some reason said oh! he is so goodlooking ! I clicked "yes" to him. Then it was not no time he replied to me on a message in my in box. It said "Hi there" ! my name is ------You are a good looking lady. I then replied back to him of thank you! I knew that all men say this and I knew that it was something they all say to all women. I had allready been knowledgeable of men and their games before so I was not new to this. He then was on line at the time, he asked me he would like to chat and if I would like his number to call.

I took his number and I called him. His voice was goofy at first and he was like to me up front. He metioned to me that he was looking for a renter in his house woud I be enterested? I said no. He talked about what he did for a living verses I did also about me. He also said that there was not nothing wrong with friends and frenge benifits. I did reply that it was not for me. So, we kind of left things as being just friends that would text and share our dates one on one about what this guy was like and he also would tell me about the women he went out with as well.

He told me about a lot of them. Things he did not like mostly. This was in May of 2011 when we started talking. We did not ask one another to meet until like months down the road. He would start to know me more. I would call him up asking him would he like to go out some where to get a drink or so. Every time I did he would have a exuse that he was at his guy friends drinking he could not drive. He turned me down so many times, the reason why was because he was shuffling women back and fourth. I did not know that then.

Well one day it happend! I was washing my car and he called me. It was September 10th 2011 at 11:00 am. He asked me if I would like to meet him at Hams. This is a local small restraunt which is in his town not but probably 20 minitues away from me.

I hung up the phone I looked so horrible I was like this mad woman wanting to make sure I looked good, for he was so handsome.

I rinsed my car off then went to a family dollar store to get some make up,safty pens and a hair doodle to put my hair up. I had some clothes in my trunck for the good will so I grabbed a cute shirt and shorts. I rushed to hams. I then saw him pull in with a Red Z71 Chevrolet, he had his un glasses on and omg! he was even so more handsome then in his pictures. He then had opened his truck door and was out. He was so tall. He had the most beautiful teeth and smile,eyes green,his hair was perfect. I was about to pass out for I never thought I would have any one look at me as good looking as he was.

I and him went inside Hamms, he of course opened the door for me. I think all men do this at first to impres you. I and him sat down across one another. At the time I did not notice him trying to order the cheapest meal on the menu. I also told him that I can pay for my own sinse I felt we was friends from the begining. It did not feel like a date any way . I and him finished and I asked him did he or has he met any one whom he may consider to see, he looked at me and said "yes, I think I have."

He said he had to finish his yard work of mowing and smiled and said sure could use some help, would I want to come over ? I said sure. I went over to his house not far from Hams. We went inside and he asked if I wanted something to drink. I did not. He sat down in his living room on the the small sofa. He had nice furniture but I noticed he did not have much of any thing else.

I sat down next to him and he all of a sudden pulled me over to him and kissed me.Not a soft kiss.This was a kiss as if he was mad.
I did not like the way he kissed me. Then he did start to touch my breast and he was making me so into him that I did let in. I let him take me to his bed and he was so like I have never in my life had in any man. It was hot! He hooked me...

We talked about all his past girl friends. He told me about his first one whom he has a daughter by which is 19 now. He said of course all bad about her. He said she cheated and was lazy became fat and that she was a pig ate all the food up. He said so much about her that I was like wow! how awful. He spoke of his one wife he married. Only first and no more. He talked negative about her. He bragged about how he was sodid this and that, worked hard. After that was others. More and more. Then there was one he had for 7 years. They got into fights, hurting fights. How he broke her ribbs where she got into his face and hit him first. It was always a woman who abused him for his actions. I believed him. I was like so into him of why would women mis treat him, why they would not clean or cook. He had this older woman who lived there from he put a ad in the paper for a renter months before I moved in. This woman was not all that attracted. He would move strangers in for he said he needed help with his house payment. He had only made 14.00 a hour. He had a child whom was 12 years old from where he had got this woman pregnate and he later after 9 months found out she had his baby. He said she set him up. I believed him.

So all of a sudden he is coming to my place and he was having me over his, he wanted me to move in because of the renter was going to have to go! He wanted her out. Yea I asked him if he and she had something going on of course no they did not.

But I do remember him telling me she would hit on him. I moved in October 1,2011. The renter moved out two days before. He asked me could I handle paying 350.00 a month. For that he did need all the help he could and it would help me as well. I moved in and I cleaned the house to spotless. He had no food he had no toilet paper, no hair shampoo. A pice of soap. He said that he learned to do things very conservative, that he need not waste money. His clothes was out dated. He had no up to date on anything. He told me things of his surviving with eating boloni sandwhiches and he made it on that. I gave him 350.00 I went and spent like over 600.00 on things for the house. Food ,laundry stuff and shampoo,ect...cleaning supplies.

I was happy. He was so sweet to me. He told me that he did not want me to turn him down on sex that he was a man who needed it everyday. I noticed so much of his ways. He was organized he was very structured. He took a shower at 6 pm he got off work at 3:30 he was off on Fridays and Saturdays. He was also very jealous! He text me all day long stupid text of "Am I smoking with my boys at work" ? He had turned into a diffrent person after three weeks. I began to drink with him, he drank every night. He smoked weed. He smoked ciggerettes but he only did when he drank. He ate at 9:30 pm I could not rest I had to cook and clean and if I did anything for me he would tell me I needed to keep him occupied. He kept on telling me he knew all about my past of being a bar fly. He had his sources. He told me that I was not going to be on the internet nor could I have my 5500 friends . He would call me if I was 5 min late coming home. I cought hell for working on a Saturday. He said I was a person who ran. He kept on and on riding me hard . He said I know you are not happy. He would put me down and if I spoke to him as Why are you doing this to me, he would laugh and mock at me. He would tell me I have no respect. He would take my panties and make me get rid of the thongs said that if I ever wore them he would choke me with them. I was not allowed to wear any thing with showing my cleavage. He would check what I wore each day. He would grab my phone to make sure I was not talking to a man. He watched me constantly. On my face book. He never had our pictures together on face book. He also called me stupid, I was achurch whore. I in November I flipped on him. I drank so much wine I left in my car and I was lucky I did not wreck get a DWI. I signed my self into a hospital for my nerves was torn up.

I was hospitalised for one week, my family said I went into a break down and was telling them all about what he was doingto me. I told them I lied that he really did not do that to me. I did it so I could go back to him. I was so much in love with him I GAVE UP MY LIFE AND MY FAMILY,FRIENDS! I continued to be treated like a dog. Sex became very much as he only wanted what he wanted to him self. He wanted me to give him oral. He stopped kissing me, he stopped telling me he loved me. He omg! he hit me caused me to have a ceisure. I LIED TO THE HOSPITAL. He one day was sweet the next mean. I had to pay more money to him 500.00 a month. I bought it all, he would drive my car for it had gas in it. His never did. He never brought no food or anything in the house,he only bought his booze or weed. He begain to use me for trips. He used me for you name it. He made me pay 800.00 for a water problem said it was my stupid fault.

He liked brown headed women.I colored my hair. I lost weight. He one day would say I think I AM ALL THAT THEN SAY i WAS NOT. I was told he loved me how everything looks good in the house that I made the home. He was a one day this or that. At night he would kick me if I snored. He had two diffrent like voices. One was a gay voice then one was a man voice. He omg he was wanting me to die. He said to my mom I was accident prone. He had me so convinced that I gave him 70.0000 on my life policy.

He never wanted any one to come over. My family kids, no one not even his. One person he confided in was his Ex of seven years. He told her bad things about me. He told me bad things of her. He omg even spent the night with her. He and her was together texting about me towards the end. He vitumised me. He made me want to kill my self. He hit me slapped me for no reason. He dragged me on the ground. He did it. I LOVED HIM STILL. I woulld tell him please can we start over. Omg! He looked at him self in the mirror al lthe time, he brushed his teeth three times a day for one hour, I am not kidding you all! He told me about his getting by with things like he was charged with assult for women and he had got out of it because he is so smart he knows the system.

He told me he shot a man. He also told me that he would try to torch his wife by the gas on the grill. He told me about how he did things. He also assulted my son and had me as a witness . He said or convenced me that my son hit him first. No he did, I lied for him. I WENT WITH OUT SPEAKING TO MY SON FOR 5 MONTHS. !! I would not call my grandmother. One day I WOULD CALL MY FRIENDS FOR HELP! then tell them I am okay! I cried wolf. I was begining to be as him. I was being into this started to go into his computer, omg! that is when things started to become worst. I saw porno sites he was on.

I saw where he had women on his emails. I also started noticing more and more each day changing patterns. He became distance from me. Telling me that I am sick need to sign my self back into the hospital. Isaw a text where he told a female, looking good! I called her. She told me the truth. I confronted him he said that was the wrong number. He lied and lied. He would never tell me to leave, he would make me live in hell. He also was wanting sex the way he wanted it. He made me so angry and sick. I cried and cried so many times in my car in another room at work. I was a complete mess for so long . I began to not want to come home I was afraid of what mood he was in.

I asked him for 20.00 for gas he said he was not my bank. He was so cold and never said he was sorry for anything. He made me think I was the one who said something when it was him. He also made me think I was the one who started a fight, it was him. He I knew was up to something and I then started to out smart him. I went on a dating site and I disguised my self as abeautiful woman. OMG he hit on me. I also found out his pass words . He had been on the dating site foe months of me still with him. I was sick and puked for what he had said to these women. He did them just as me. He is on there today doing the same. He is in desperate need of a woman. He wants another victum as me! I am so stupid ashamed of my self for not listening to others. I am stupid to not believe his own daughter.

I have been a victum of abuse, violence. It has been only three weeks now on my own! I packed my stuff left him with most of it. I got me a apartment in one day I bought me new everything. Thank God for my job and my bosses who gave me the use of a truck and 1,000 dollars. I love it. I am mad and very angry for he is never going to be stopped. Those poor women on the dating site are feeding into his trap. I thought about making a fake profile to let them know about him. Lat weekend he text me only to say "DO I KNOW WHO MY ENEMIES WAS ? That is odd to say....

I hate him I wish I never met him. I can not focus on nothing but wanting him to pay for what he did to me. I am scared for I do not want another man in my life. I feel ugly, I think I am. I have no self esteem. I am at the end and I going to start my book and the one chapter will be my own experience of a man of sickness and evil ...... [/quote]

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#13795 - 09/05/12 04:57 PM Re: Sex and the Psychopath [Re: Whitefeather]
Brokenintopieces Offline
member

Registered: 09/04/12
Posts: 6
I know how you feel, my life on my own now three weeks. I was in a hell house. I loved him more so then anyone anything! I GAVE HIM ME! He stole my life from me. I WANT IT BACK.
_________________________
Ales

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#13796 - 09/05/12 08:53 PM Re: Sex and the Psychopath [Re: Brokenintopieces]
Whitefeather Offline
member

Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 39
Hi brokentopieces,

just want to say that from this site I learnt about psychopathy for all it's realness, your life with this person sounds as strange as my experience. I don't think anyone can make it better or say anything to make us feel better but I like your I want my life back words and good your writing a book about your experience the way I see it a excellent way to help others this site is endless knowledge for me I never knew what was out there really we live in a world of masquerade I really read your story and I truly admire your strength yes your not alone! I am in counselling every second day now for the last two months the only way I can see out of his sight is to have my plan and go as far as possible for a new future as you and many others here have described we can start anew and learn as much as possible and help ourselves and others not fall prey
take care of yourself
I think what your doing is amazing
whitefeather

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#13797 - 09/05/12 10:42 PM Re: Sex and the Psychopath [Re: Whitefeather]
Brokenintopieces Offline
member

Registered: 09/04/12
Posts: 6
Thank you for reading such a long story,as I was writing this the whole time I am like trying to just say it all in so many words for each and every one of us try to tell everything. But yet we still have moras each day goes by I try to keep a clear mind. For when I close my eyes I think wow! Three weeks ago I was pleading to god to help me. And now in my own place with out him in bed next to me wandeing when he would be thinking of how he wanted me dead. For I also think back of everything of all he has done and said to only remind me over and over that he can no longer hurt me. I do not have to sneak and take a chance getting caught looking into his phone and trying to keep my mouth shut for of how I wanted to confront him . I now want to send him a long long letter of I know now who is and I am going to stop him from hurting all others who he is now trying to win his charm . I do hate him. I never hated, but him I do. He is a cold evil devil . He belongs in prison .his bragging to me of him shooting someone,his asault charges he got out of. I am mad each day . I am so upset I can't stop this thing with wanting to get even . I want to know how to hurt them back ..
_________________________
Ales

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#13800 - 09/06/12 01:24 PM Re: Sex and the Psychopath [Re: Brokenintopieces]
newme34 Offline
member

Registered: 09/05/12
Posts: 5
The way to hurt a Psychopath is to ignore it. Any letter will be seen as a sign of interest regardless of what it says as the Psychopath thrives on attention. Look at NO CONTACT again. Its the only way. It will be crazy for a while but worth it.

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