Hi All,
I came agross a question again.
I wonder if you recognize this.

My p son can't speak in a normal way. He always shouts.
His hard voice gets louder while telling on of his stories.
Now, I have a thing with sound an noice, I know.
For me, because of my youth, sounds and noice are related with violence.
I corrected this during my years on this planet, but still most of the time I life in silence.( and in the meantime I am the leadsinger in a band!!)
The sound of his voice seems to hurt me to my bones.
I like to know if people here know about this also?

I have to add ; I asked people who met with him if they think he is loud or it's just me...They agree...all of them. They can't stand to be around him longer then a short time, because of the loudness he speaks with. So I can asume this is an objective observation.

Hi James...
What do you mean ith the following?

he often comes very close physically, which to means almost sexual harassment

Segaya

I found this aspect of my p disturbing ie the nakedness in front of his sons. I am pleased to hear that a male found it unacceptable too, I did wonder if it was just me and all men are not bothered about nakedness amongst themselves. Also he was not bothered if our sons heard any lovemaking sounds. It totally put me off if they were upstairs in their bedroonms in case they heard the bed creak, as i felt that they would feel really sick and embarrassed by it but he would not accept this, he said that it would not bother them. We had a lot of rows about this one. Just another example where he would never respect my feelings.

But he voice thing, no. He never shouted but it would go up a few octaves if he was throwing one if his drama scenes. It would have spoiled his image of a poor me little victim which is the thing that has manipulated our sons so that they accept his version of reality.

Hello Mati,

I am sorry to hear from you that you had similar experiences.

My father is completely shameless.
I should also not other things he did, things that underline his promiscuous borderless, limitless indiscreet disguising behaviour:

He used so ski naked and he says he used to go to the nudists, says he doesn't understand why people aren't running around naked everywhere

When we meet with friends and relatives, sit around the table, he often talks about uncomfortable indiscreet, even obscene subjects like: masturbation, pervert sexual acts: says that women love to be tortured and hit in bed, mental illnesses, dermatological illnesses, bacteria, etc...

He used to talk (and still does) to anyone about everything in our family. No limit, no borders at all.
Interestingly, he doesn't talk to us about our family, he doesn't even live with us. Last year he only spent 1 month with us! 11 Away. But everyone has to take part in our "family life". He keeps large speeches in front of crowds of 10-30 people at parties, meetings...
Sometimes I am there, but my mother avoided these crowds in the last 8-10 years.

When I was a kid my father used to undress me very often, not completely, of course, but like took everything off of me except my underpants. I would often run away, but then he'd force me to undress. I felt like raped.
He always walks around in underpants (which are disgustingly dirty).
I don't understand why someone would walk around naked in the house...
Let's say people are on the beach: it's normal. But why all the time???
He's exhibitionist.

My father often talks about sexual "components" of people. In front of others he loves jokes about penises and etc. etc...
I feel offended and disgusted, embarrassed.
When I was a boy of 10-15, he exposed me to horrible long embarrassing discussion in public about about sexual themes. Usually about me. I won't tell you what he said, I would feel horribly embarrassed even on this forum.

I can tell you that all these speeches and behaviours seem to have something to do with these:

-> I think my father and P's love to "show their butt" in public, they probably think they are beautiful or that people would like them... anyway they are aware that they have effect on us
-> I read about Psychopaths that they have a "trivial sex life", I interpret this as a primitive behavior, childish, the behavior of a disturbed teen, something like that
-> lack of affection in sex: from what I heard from my father, to him women are like some sexual objects
-> difficulty in attracting women: my father is promiscuous, charming, but women don't really like him (some of them do), but I think in most cases he has no idea why he cannot attract them... even though he hates my mom, I cannot imagine him with another woman, I guess if my mom would leave him, he'd remain alone like a boy

That's about all that comes into my mind about his promiscuous behaviour.

I haven't participated in the Forum for quite some time...I've been trying to put some pieces of my life back together! It takes a toll on our lives to such an extent that there is always something new [and huge] to deal with! I want to write more, but I could get caught as I am now having to live back home and it could get me hurt very bad if anyone reads this.

This post caught my attention because I am in the house with my [LOUD MOUTH] Psychopath. sister!!!!

Gotta go quick!!!!

Hi Segaya!!!

Yes!! I've experienced the exact same thing! My mother is a psychopath, and she has the coldest, harshest voice ever. It gives me chills, even when she's not yelling at me.
When she'll call me or ask me to do something, she shouts, and it sounds as if she is very angry with me (even if she's not).
A friend who was visiting me once asked why my mother was yelling at me, I said, "You are very smart to notice that. She's actually not yelling right now though." UGH CREEPY!