My first post, great site too, forgive me if I'm all over the place, so much to tell and hard to know where to start
Just wanted to say that I think I am a scapegoat,
, all my life with my family, mostly between my mother and me, I always get blamed, I even got blamed for my sisters death, her depression and her daughters depression! Well, I have to say, my sister started doing drugs and being very promiscuous at a very young age, running away from home,started lies very early age, etc, thinking now the poor thing was probably psycopathic and I'm certain, as she was the golden child, that she and my mother were co dependents/enabler, my mother used to buy her pain pills and claimed she didnt' know she'd been doing drugs, whatever, she did some crazy stuff that can only be blamed on drugs. My mother destroyed her because..she was the chosen one. My mother has excluded me, lied to me, blamed me, projected, mirrored, great actress, people would never know her by chatting with her friendly self, I was shocked the first time I saw her great act of being glad to see me in front of other family when we'd just had a major blow up hours before, WOW, it was remarkable. She is not sympathetic to anyone, and when her father was dying, she was pissed and said he just wanted attention! He died 2 days later, breaks my heart again thinking of this
Well recently she just turned my father and my sister against me, i'm sure she didnt' tell the WHOLE story about what I said, because the punishment did NOT fit the crime, I was not disrespectful, as my father suddenly claims, WHO btw talks so bad of her and says she hates his guts, constant badgering and cutting down, so for him to suddenly TURN ON ME, not speak to me, when this past 6 months he and my husband have had non stop projects together but after my sister texted me cussing me and calling me a loon that needed meds, i was stunned, I shouldn't have been, she's been doing that for years after hearing tales from the mother, but I didnt' go to their house for christmas, hardly ever do anyway, always some drama, so now he doesn't speak to me
I can't for the life of me figure out how she got him to stop talking to me after he told me at thanksgiving, he woke up thanking God I was his duaghter, What gives? he told me I needed to respect my mother, and I told him I never disprespected her, it's like I can't have my say but they can and I get ganged up on, all over trivial things, but NEVER has he turned on me however, I think he's a little psychopathic or narcissistic, though sometimes I really think he loves me, now I'm confused. He really doesnt' seem to have any empathy towards people and has a repuatation for being mean but our personalites are alot alike and we like the same things though my husband and I know he lies at the drop of a hat, never can keep his stories straight but he's a hoot, one of those funny guys
My sister is very narcissistic, has to have the best of everything so she measures her self worth by where she lives and what she drives etc, she's been known to say "i'm getting mine" in regards to my mother keeping her children, in regards to my mother having favorite grandchildren, she makes her keep her children, mine got ganged up so they quit going over, and now have no relationship with their grandparents and I guess they dont' give a care, they'll give them money at christmas is about all, yet they talked so badly of my deceased sisters inlaws, who dont' do anything for their grandaughter, haha, what is THAT? double standards again
But I am the one the parents usually depend on and have always helped in any way I could, not either of my sisters however, but I noticed after her parents were gone, she no longer had much contact with me, realization hit me, she didnt' need me so i was useless to her then
Any advice or tips? should I just be glad they are leaving me alone? My sister seems clueless that she's not getting the whole stories, I know this because I know how my mother is miserable and complains about everything and doesnt' LIKE anyone and my father has even told me how she complains about me and about him coming over to see us
Does this sound like a house of psychos?? I'm in my 40's and just now realizing this past few years and recently especially with my dads turning of the tables, that I've been in a somewhat mentally neglectful and slightly or more, abusive household!
Of course there is a lifetime of stories I could tell, maybe this is the book I've been waiting to write!
Anyway, pretty awkward, we are neighbors!
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