hi everybody,
I've been researching online for awhile to try to figure out wtf is going on w/my extended family and friends. we come from a tightnit community where everybody knows everyone. Over the years, myself and my nuclear family have endured manipulation, verbal and emotional abuse, etc by our extended family and friends.
i have soooooo many examples to give you but let me narrow them down to a few. I've had rumours spread about me, family members staring at me from afar and laughing THEN come up to talk to me w/the biggest smile (mind you, i have 20/20 vision). passive-aggresive behavior from not showing up at a scheduled rendevouz to making sarcastic comments that are meant to hurt me (which they don't). i was introduced by my "friends" to this guy who was just like them and he managed to verbally and emotionally abuse me and humiliate me in front of my enemies and is proud of the fact that he made me cry and told everyone. (he's gone btw). mind you, my friends knew he was bad from the beginning and were laughing at me when i told them i broke up and didn't show any empathy whatsoever.
it's like they know that i'm not like them, but i guess they are trying to "break" me into either becoming them or just see me as an easy target since i don't speak up often. then again, just because somebody doesn't speak up doesn't mean they can't see or hear the crap that is going on around them. BUT, i have developed a defensive attitude where i don't let anyone's crap slide by me.
i think my problem is that i gave people the benefit of the doubt and that i gave it to the WRONG people. unfortunately, these are my extended family members and acquaintances. what i want to know is how the f can i ignore these people when i'm practically related to them? anybody want to adopt us? lol ok, seriously I AM FED UP w/them trying to label me and control my life and basically trying to put me 6 feet under!!! the only good thing about this whole situation is that all these years, I thought i was the one with the problem, I thought i was the one that was going crazy but until one day, I WOKE UP!! as a result, i have suffered from depression and extreme panic attacks. i have confronted some psychopaths in my family and they turned around w/crocodile tears claiming i was mean. any enlightement is strongly needed here!!!!! thank you!!